Why Are We Still Silent About Mental Health in a Telugu household? | Dr. Vishnu Gade | Unscripted
Author Name:Unscripted with Meghana Reddy
Youtube Channel Url:https://www.youtube.com/@UnscriptedMeghana
Youtube Video URL:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X81JjiNFtGo
Title: Why Are We Still Silent About Mental Health in a Telugu household? | Dr. Vishnu Gade | Unscripted
Author Name: Unscripted with Meghana Reddy
Description: Psychiatrist Dr. Vishnu Gade discusses mental health in a simple and practical way — from depression and teenage stress to parenting, social media, loneliness, women’s and men’s mental health, and modern psychiatric treatments.
We explore why people hesitate to visit a psychiatrist, how to differentiate sadness from depression, how social media affects emotional health, and why mental health education should begin at an early age.
⏱️ TIMESTAMPS
00:00 – Introduction
01:38 – Meet the Psychiatrist & Breaking Mental Health Stigma
04:30 – Why Did He Choose Psychiatry? His Journey Begins
08:20 – Mental Health Stigma in Families & Society
10:00 – Why People Hesitate to Visit a Psychiatrist
13:30 – Astrology vs Psychiatry: When Mental Health Gets Overlooked
15:41 – Sadness vs Depression: How to Tell the Difference
17:47 – Can Depression Improve Naturally? Lifestyle & Treatment
19:52 – Hidden Depression: Recognising the Warning Signs
23:42 – Academic Pressure & the Mental Health of Teenagers
28:18 – Parenting, Comparison & Supporting Children
31:37 – Why Social Media Is Affecting Emotional Health
33:49 – Social Media, Comparison & the Dopamine Cycle
39:53 – Mental Health Advice on Social Media: What to Trust?
47:35 – Can Parents Pass Mental Health Patterns to Children?
51:07 – Women’s Mental Health: PMS, Stress & Life Changes
57:20 – Mental Health Education Should Start in Schools
01:07:32 – Emotional Readiness & Loneliness
01:15:25 – Men’s Mental Health: Why Men Hide Their Emotions
01:26:20 – TMS, Modern Psychiatry & the Future of Mental Health
01:37:13 – Seeking Help & The Final Message: “You’re Not Alone”
#mentalhealth #psychiatrist #DrVishnuGade #depression #mentalhealthawareness #psychiatry #teenager #parenting #socialmedia #mensmentalhealth #womensmentalhealth #mentalhealthstigma #mentalhealthpodcast #tms #mentalhealthmatters
Transcript:
(00:00) To start off, you're a psychiatrist. Let's be honest, everyone likes the cardiologist, the neurologist, Gandhi Hospital in Second. Then I saw the hardcore cases, very sad one cases, children that changed my whole perspective in most psychiatrist. That's how they consider it. >> Even till date people cannot pronounce it correctly.
(00:32) They might say psychiatrist, psychiatrist. But China you know what they used to call us doctor. >> Most people might visit a astrologist before coming to a psychiatrist. Is that true? >> Marriage sadly is not going so smoothly. So the pujari comes suggests few pujas to be done but then again nothing happened and that was actually on the >> Telugu student particularly MZ IIT Chadali USL Pali Pali.
(01:01) So what does this kind of mapping do to a teenager brain? >> Now to start it off I would say I'm also part of this factory. >> Social media makes you want to compare your life with another person. I I think that's the worst thing for this uh generation in mental health aspect. What do you think? We never talk about [music] men's mental health.
(01:28) [music] >> The beauty with men [music] mental health, depression, anxiety, addiction last 12 mental health psychiatric specialist Dr.
(02:24) More importantly, depression, anxiety, de addiction is qualifications, philosophy, mental health. last option. Soal judge Thank you so much for joining with us on unscripted. How are you doing? >> Hello. Thank you Magna. I'm really good. How are you doing? Thank you for having me.
(03:06) >> I'm good, thank you. To start off, you're a psychiatrist wedding function relatives. >> So this is not just one function. It can be multiple like birthday parties or weddings or home pujas. But starting low, it used to be awkward. I mean maybe in like early 2010s or something when I was a student as well but gradually gradually you see the people change with their expressions and be like Mundo it will be like oh miss psychiatrist and she like oh wow miss psychiatrist so I feel the you know the people are getting
(03:43) more get to know about psychiatry as a medical subject >> and awareness is increasing uh thanks to social media the government and uh policy makers. So I think again like I said people like you also who are you know forefronting this so we are doing very good in that but related law still uh it is going to be a tricky task because let's be honest everyone likes the cardiologists likes the neurologists the physicians uh so when it comes to the other subjects say there is a little bit bias but then again people go with
(04:20) passion and their own personal stories >> uh So whatever it is now, I feel we're doing good. Better than 2010 for sure. >> Yes. But why mind? Why did you choose this part? >> So interestingly uh my aunt's a psychiatrist in Chicago. >> So then uh so I grew up with her as well. So she was a student of Usmania during her MBBS days and then uh they used to you know discuss with me you know we saw this case.
(04:51) I was very little. I wouldn't know anything but you know how we used to play doctor >> we used to have this toys the board games the lighting you know those kind of things so then it was always fascinating you know about it and then being from a doctor family I think it's since childhood not you know innately instilled like hey you have to be a doctor but constantly everyone around you talking about it e patient >> e you know discussion and all then you get dragged into it then I think when she also became a resident, >> okay,
(05:22) >> for psychiatry in the US. uh we used to you know connect on call and maybe Apuru as you know I think this was in the early 2000s okay landline and then again expensive calls international calls would be so expensive you would just have like hey 5 minutes you know that everyone in the house has to talk with the person >> so I remember that 5 minutes would be so awesome she' be like she the same thing again repeat okay I saw you know a bipolar patient today I saw a schizophrenic patient today I didn't know what it meant but the tourist you
(05:54) would say [snorts] you know their you know uh traumas their you know struggles and how that patient from then has become better maybe say 6 months later okay it was always fascinating to me and then when I went to med school uh again like I said psychiatry patients we wouldn't see a lot but we had a very good department so I was from Kamini medical college in Nipali alganda >> so we had a department I still remember a female PhD a postgradu student she was very interested to teach us classes how we were as students you know class
(06:32) but she used to make it a point to tell interesting cases or be like hey do your homework and come I'm going to tell you something better about this so that also piqu my interest I think and then I think I did my uh yeah I think it was an internship which I did in Gandhi >> okay >> Gandhi hospital in secundrabad then I saw the hardcore cases, the very sad ones, >> okay, >> the traumatic ones, then they were like traumatic abuse cases, children who would be like, you know, traumatic because of abusive parents, alcoholic
(07:06) fathers. I think that changed my whole perspective >> hearing all good stories >> like hey sunshine and rainbows >> then suddenly coming into the government hospital seeing like 20 30 patients every day and all were like one worse than the other >> it hits you at some point and then I did you know you are attached you're not allowed to treat them but you're attached to a doctor and you do the rounds with them you roam around and learn with them and do the whatever the extra internship roles.
(07:40) So then one case got so much better. I still remember they came to the hospital with one sweet box >> and I was rotated. I was in a different department. They came searching for me and my other friend uh and they came and gave that small sweet box. So that was a very sweet thing. And then I thought why not the mind because fever, cold, cough 3 days maximum 5 days, one week you do get better.
(08:04) mental health is so so chronic or longlasting sometimes it takes years and months and when you're on that journey with them you become a part of them yes >> or the family and it did feel really good and then when I think I took a decision that I'm going to go to the psychiatry route >> I'm so glad you did that >> uh but uh growing up uh mental health an was it a thing in your family did people talk about it >> uh not openly like I said Again it uh it still is a stigma >> because okay coming to this question yes in my relatives or in the family there
(08:40) were people who were not suffering directly with the severe cases but hey okay copund >> yes yes >> personality he's a very dominating person uh the you know a girl or the women in the family she's gets cranky very easily okay now medically looking back you could have thought hey maybe it's hormon maybe it's PM missing maybe somewhere maybe go to the gynecologist get a checkup so Atlanta but no one used to go everyone would be like in mani in >> so those kind of a things but yeah in the family they cases but now like when
(09:18) you asked Jinapur we didn't know >> and even while studying we didn't know to be honest but now that we know the subject we know how to identify so that's why we are here >> to identify to educate ate the people so that the things are not delayed and when things go out of hand >> and being from a doctor family also there are so many things we missed >> there might be hey go to the doctor sooner why don't you get yourself checked or at least assessed once but we didn't because even we wouldn't know >> I just got conscious that uh you would
(09:52) have judged my personality on all of it by [laughter] now >> no >> we are off duty sometimes [laughter] >> so coming back to mental health in most that's how they consider it. So what do you think about that? >> It is sad to be honest. Uh when I was like I said again interning uh we could see obviously people they're uneducated they wouldn't even know how to pronounce the word psychiatrist.
(10:25) >> Psychologist even till date people cannot pronounce it correctly. They might say psychiatrist, psychiatrist something like that but still but chinapuro you know what they used to call us doctor >> that's how it is. So then a mental doctor then again like I said education wise improvement or like psycho education or in the hospital okay this department deals with this you need to go there because you have an issue like this and then you know people got educated about it and now like I said it's getting better
(10:58) >> uh but uh still in the rural areas because we do our camps sometimes we go deep into the interior tribal areas and villages as well uh Then when you do say uh sorry we can say neuro >> to you know help or ease it out. Yes doctor we cover it up sometimes but the moment you say psychiatrist or mental health >> it goes the other way sometimes sadly it's not consciously but >> it does happen.
(11:33) I think most people cardiologist 25 year old you know a kid I mean a person parents cardiologist psychiatrist they feel hesitant. Yeah, that is true. uh then again like I said because of the stigma >> uh sadly I can uh openly say one thing if it is a teenager people are very hesitant >> you know for example especially if it's a girl the physician might say okay I have a doubt your daughter's going through terrible stress >> because the girl sadly will tell the doctor everything father mother >> so what happens is the disconnect is
(12:13) there the parents don't know what's happening with the child they believe everything's all right but then the physician identifies it first then he might refer to us the specialist. So once they come to us uh then we can dig a little bit more but the fear is once they do come to the hospital they feel they're branded.
(12:33) >> Yeah. >> Ohasari psychiat there's nothing wrong in it. It's just a checkup an assessment. There might not be anything necessarily wrong with the person but we are there to identify it. If it is there, yes. If it's not there, everyone's happy. But even for that prim uh the primary checkup, people don't want to show up because they are thinking they're getting branded.
(12:56) Oh, my daughter or son/ is uh a psychiatric patient. She's going to be a mental illness patient for lifelong. So these are the stigmas which we need to you know assess. Just one visit is not going to label you or brand you and it's not lifelong. And then again anything treated earlier is much better. For example, you come at say teenagers if you have an issue you don't treat it for multiple years it's going to be so bad.
(13:23) It's going to be very tricky and it's going to be very hard for us as doctors to treat it medically as well. >> Uh most people might visit a astrologist before coming to a psychiatrist. Is that true? Did it happen? It happened in a few marital cases because uh uh funny story it just happened like I think two years ago I think so it was an arranged marriage they went to their family astrologer numerologist whatever >> okay >> dantarawata whatever marriage sadly is not going so smoothly xy z reasons it can be so many
(13:58) multiple reason then they call back the the astrologer and say hey you said everything in the kundi is fine Now what is this happening? >> So the pujari comes and then he you know apparently suggests few pujas to be done, few mantras to be done. The woman has to go fasting for certain next days. The husband has to go to some temple in Ahmedabad somewhere and he has to do certain rituals and come back.
(14:26) Okay, they did all that but then again nothing happened. So again they had to come back to the you know like a proper doctor. Then again same thing they went to the family physician got referred to us at the hospital that's when we realized it was something actually important it was a you know bipolar case which was actually missed >> okay >> and that was actually on the boy's side >> so no one identified they try you know sadly blaming the wife >> she was a house housewife maybe because she's not doing certain things correctly
(14:56) she's not taking care of the household or the husband correctly and uh the household is not correct but what was missed is the husband had childhood teenage bipolarity. >> Okay, >> mostly we call it cyclic >> uh depression which means few months he'll be all right, few months he'll have the depression phases where he might be very cranky, angry, all those you know depressive signs and so in those negative phases he would have fights with the wife >> and so that discord was missed.
(15:26) So we treated the bipolarity in the male and then things calmed down. The fights subsided the husband wife became happy at the end and uh that was you know a happy story at the end. >> Yes. I'm glad but everyone feels sad. What is a big deal? I'm not too there's a in fact I feel it sometimes.
(15:49) What would you say the difference is between being sad and being depressed? So sadness it affects everyone and day. Now put depression it's a medical condition or a disorder >> where there have to be certain criteria met like for example the three main ones we look for are like sadness which is constant not like hey 1 minute I'm sad one minute no it has to be throughout the day or more uh hours of the day lasting few weeks or months then it has to be In a pan you get easily tired, fatigue ability then you lose interest in what you used to have before. For
(16:28) example, you used to go for a movie on a Sunday, meet your friends for a dinner. You start avoiding those things slowly slowly your uh personality is changing a little bit. You are avoidant and you're shunning yourself. >> Yes. >> So that criteria and there are other more 78 like that like sleep, concentration, work, self-care etc.
(16:49) So that criteria if you meet you can be diagnosed as having clinical depression be it stages borderline mild moderate severe now sadness again like think of it like blues it's an emotional status which it can be temporary be it with the stress be it with the your day not going well maybe your bossing you or maybe you wanted your favorite team to win in the IPL and you lost by one ball so those things also do affect you right so after a few hours or maybe one two days you get back to your routine. Your brain is
(17:22) trained in such a way that these chemicals this happy chemical the sad chemical. So these uh neurochemicals they fluctuate and then they come back to balance after a few hours or days. But in depression what happens that it stays like that. >> It doesn't normalize or doesn't revert to its normaly.
(17:41) So that's when you know you need help. But there's no way for it to subsidize on its own until it needs medical help. >> No, no, no. See, we our brain is so beautiful. The body is a wonderful, you know, uh, thing. You do your, you know, natural things like good sleep, good diet, meet people. Don't be alone. Avoid these substances like smoking, alcohol.
(18:02) Majorly 80% people might get better with this. Or else again do your exercise, read, start reading your books. We change your lifestyle. M >> you know that's what we say and if there's a stressor somewhere you identify it yourself and remove yourself from that place for example you have an alcohol problem but still you're meeting your friends at the local bar or local pub and having those drinks every day that's not a good sign so identify it remove yourself from that so avoid those friends meet new friends hey go play
(18:34) football play basketball or just go join a reading club the new circle so your pattern has to be changed So the naturally your brain adapts. So it needs at least 30 to 40 days uh studies say 40 to 45 days for any normaly or a habit to change. So do that primarily but still if it's not able and your body is in a bad state you're not sleeping well you're having these medical symptoms like headaches back pains you're crying a lot and the red flag here is very very negative thoughts for example selfharming behaviors or self u uh
(19:11) harming yourself to life or harming others >> the suicidal thoughts those are the things that are the red flags immediately you need to come to the doctor but if you want to try uh stage one try these lifestyle modifications for like at least 2 3 weeks then come visit the psychiatrist at the hospital or if you're not comfortable you can meet the psychologist or a counselor and at least get yourself assessed so then you'll have a root map what your current status is okay certain say a is like now uh then maybe two weeks tvata are you
(19:43) improving yes or not if you feel you're not improving and regressing then we are always available medications are the gold standard But uh you know if a person could be depressed they'll be very you know happy and all that put together. How do you actually recognize or you know so difficult? >> Good question.
(20:07) Uh some people are very good to hide their emotions. Maskingum they mask their emotions the sadness their anger very well. So and it is very sad. I mean we read it in the newspaper so often and not you know uh the su okay a student didn't do well in an exam suddenly they jumped up from a building or tried to commit self harm >> yes >> you know that person is a very cheerful person a kid for example but then small subtle signs >> maybe you can miss it and like I said you might say okay this is just a phase just leave it >> but the crying the anger the breaking
(20:47) stuff, the hitting, >> the avoiding locking yourself in your room. >> Yeah, >> these things one day, okay, two days fine. And if it is going for more than say a few days or weeks, that is a red flag. That is when you need to, you know, >> talk to your child. >> Yeah. >> Or anyone be it a friend who has gone through a bad breakup, uh a spouse who has lost a job >> or the most common things I see these days is the stock market.
(21:13) >> Okay. due to the whatever the wars the situation financial a lot of people have lost money invested like crores >> so that is a traumatic thing so that is a shocking thing so the red flags they can smile >> they can be cheerful because they're trying to pretend or they're genuinely trying to be normal like we want to you being uh like for example you're a mother you want to put a you know brave face for your children right you don't want to be crying in front of them and a lot of people there's nothing wrong in it. They cry
(21:45) behind closed doors or in the bathroom during showers. I say nothing wrong. Do it. But what I tell my you know uh friends, family or my patients is let your emotions out. Be it anger, be it crying, be it whatever. Let it out in your close group. If you're very embarrassed or that you know you your things are going to be spread like gossip, do it within you know this restricted best friends group or confidants.
(22:13) >> Yes. So that's when you release it and then the mask comes off >> and keeping the mask on for too long is also not correct. >> Very bad for the person going through things >> and it is not good for the health, the physical health, the mental health, the social health. Social health family >> and they will be still thinking yes it is all good.
(22:37) The reason I said family is because if something bad does happen, it is the family who feels the guilt the most and they start blaming themsel in turn. Oh, doctor. So that guilt feeling is again like a toxic web. It affects everyone in the house. >> Think like think of it like uh cancer. >> Yeah. >> One patient in the house has cancer. It's the whole household will be affected.
(23:04) Be it emotionally, financially, whatever, physically. Same thing with psychiatry. There's one psychiatry, a mental health issue. >> Yeah, >> let's use this word, the mental health issue. The whole family is affected. >> So that's why I say be open, talk it out, express your feelings. I think Jenzi kids are doing it a bit more. >> Yeah.
(23:25) >> Uh like I said, I think we had the conversation before as well. They're doing it a little bit more. So try to understand what is balance. Yes, you have an issue, don't overexemplify it. Don't exaggerate it. Stick to it and if it is normal, yes, if it is not, we are there to help you out. >> Since you brought up students, you know, a Telugu student particularly, their life is mapped and first, MSET, IIT, Chadali, Pel, uh, USL, Poly, Pel, it's all mapped.
(23:57) So what does this kind of mapping do to a teenager brain? >> Very good question Magna. Now to start it off I would say I'm also part of this factory. >> Okay. >> So even I I came out through the academyy's kakatya chaitanya and all. So we been through it. We know what happens inside out. It's hectic. It's grueling. You wake up in morning 7.
(24:19) You go to the coaching center 8. You are there till 5 6 then again study. Then again exams back to back because you're trained in a way like hey India is a very populous country as you know the list seats are again limited >> so for example one lakh seats there are almost like 10 lakhs 20 lakh students fighting for that >> even one coveted seat beat whatever engineering medical UPSC whatever so now you are trained from childhood race you you call it whatever be it a rat race beat whatever race it is you don't do well now there stages which I see 10th parents
(25:05) college life is sorted sorry we got it we go to the undergrad undergrad you need to have a good masters you get in a good IV league or something in national then your life is set so it the standards keep changing school it's over now but it's never over there is no finish line see education I feel is never ending >> you can keep studying till you're 50 till you're 80 whatever you're always trying to improve yourself in any field be it science AI medical law >> especially uh that way soap I feel it is getting more and more
(25:48) stressful because mur it was a little easier I don't know Why? But maybe it was again the the competition of the population but again for that time the seats were limited >> for this generation the seats are again increasing but for the population I think the ratio is matching but still it's not enough.
(26:08) So but the government is increasing more and more. Uh so it's again a debate is it good or is it bad. >> So you're tuning your brain either you get first or you're a nobody. Number one thing >> especially in Telugu household >> especially college top college not any B >> US have to be in the top colleges then again sadly there's a financial thing also you know financial constraints are there if seats are the are expensive their kas in it BCAT AAT ccat at lachalun so everything is competition and if you don't get well you are like not a good uh uh part of the family.
(26:54) >> You won't get a good girl or a good boy to >> and and it starts with actually siblings. Now miji it's very true but it's marriage when okay 25 but think of it at 16 >> the sibling rivalry starts look at your sister she's getting more marks than you know in waste life and then like I said again college 2025 US all these things are you know instilled again they're like the societal norms it is there and I think it is in a lot of cultures maybe it can be whatever north Indian, Gujarati, Marathi >> but South Indian uh people as far as I
(27:39) know are more stricter when it comes to studies compared to the other communities because I've seen few supportive parents who you know kids for example last month I had a kid goes to one of the top schools in Hyderabad Papa and the girl didn't do well >> now okay her brother studies in a very good college in the US, New York law.
(28:02) I don't know the name, Browns or something. So, she also aspires to go to some Ivy League, but she sadly is not having the grades or the GPA to do so. She might get into a good college. The father is ready to pay and all that. So, she's lucky she has good family support. So, in front of me, the father did a very beautiful gesture.
(28:23) She said, you know, beta, I don't care if you go to there. I'll send you to Dubai. I'll send you to Singapore, wherever you want to go. Don't have to beat yourself up so bad because we are not comparing you. And then the father was so surprised. We never had this discussion with our kids. >> Then you know one-on-one session.
(28:41) Then it came out that it was one of the aunts >> who put it in his head >> into the girl's head. Okay. >> Okay. Now you are like like okay you are like the future of a family. You're the next generation. uh you have see your brother's doing so well you know he's going to get a good rishta someone you also need to do that family name is going to come down man society all that which are totally not needed for a 15year-old girl per se so that is when she took it negatively and on herself and like I said guilt feelings
(29:15) is the you know red red flag because it goes in so many ways which you won't ever expect the girl you know may stop even having an interest in career. She might even avoid college. She might, you know, avoid her career, whatever studies because she's starting to blame herself that she's not good enough, that she's not worth it.
(29:36) >> But that's what we need to say. So when the dad said that in front of me, I was so, you know, pleasantly and genuinely happy. He didn't even care about anything. He was like, I don't care wherever you go. You tell me where. He like, put a map in front of you. Just put a finger and I'll send you to that country.
(29:54) So those small small beautiful you know family support moments you know that's what I feel is needed and again no not criticizing anyone uh everyone needs to study you know at the end education is the most important thing >> but the reason I said this is because in in that business community so he told me again even if my daughter doesn't do whatever she wanted to do interior and designing architecture uh I'll open a company for her >> and she can run the Because again it's in the blood, it's in the genes.
(30:24) >> So, so that's a plan B. So as a family member, as a parent, there's always plan A and always you need to have a plan B for your kids. >> Yes. So I feel parents need to do a lot in that area. I feel >> talking to the kids is number one. >> See sadly again that the girl didn't tell her father because she was scared.
(30:45) But then again the aunt planting that seed of negativity was again maybe right or wrong I won't say it was hers when when we asked the aunt we had a phone call with her because I didn't leave it I was like hindu so she was like it was my way of morally boosting her and at least pushing her because I felt she was getting a little bit lazy maybe she was maybe because she was like she was happy with her grades so the aunt was like I want to push her more >> her GPA I felt could do could have been better. So in her own way aunt was like
(31:20) boosting her morally but see the girl took it a very negative negative way. So you never know. You can never tell. Right. >> Right. And this happens with adults as well. The words may be misinterpreted. >> The especially with text. That's why I say if you want to talk something, you have a fight with your friend.
(31:43) Never text. >> Always have a phone call or leave a voice message which is it doesn't have to be 1 minute. Just leave a 20 second voice message. you know because sometimes that emotion becomes very very misinterpreted in texts. So even while explaining to kids that genuinely you know uh 15 years old 20 year olds even 20 I would say these uh this generation are emotionally a little bit lacking >> now I might get a little bit heat for this but see again the kids are growing so rapidly >> everything is social media the
(32:17) everything is impulsive. So some things we were trained okay we were scooled ated like fight 10 times or I remember you know a principal in a Catholic school would you know have a nice whack you know whack at us sometimes and it was okay uh because it was like >> we used to be naughty as well we were reprimanded in satisfaiming I will complain you to the police >> even parents for example this happens a lot in the US uh parents shout or even there's a small hint of uh no I'm going to ground you or I'm going to slap you
(32:54) 911. The kid calls the cops on the parents and this happens so so so uh frequently mna it is shocking at least in India it's not there but it is happening >> it might happen so >> it is already there >> okay they call police >> the 18 year olds the 20 year olds they are like I'm an adult now I'm going to call the cops you have no right to tell me so and so >> so it can be used as so many things for example don't go out at Don't roam on the roads. Come back home.
(33:28) 18 year olds and 19year-olds kids are like, "Who are you to tell me?" The dad is like, "It's my house, my rules, my bike. I paid for your bike or your car. I'm the one paying for your petrol. Don't do that. It's not safe. Don't drink and drive." The kids are like, "No, >> you can blame social media for it.
(33:45) " And and also another thing comparison siblings or friends or you know things like that but social media makes you want to compare your life with another person. I I think that's the worst thing for this uh generation in mental health aspect. What do you think? uh see Andy one uh comparison in the sense of learning something is for example an art there's a musician now there's a real how he's playing it and for some reason you want to take up the art or you are already a musician but you're not up there you're not the best but you try to
(34:24) imitate or copy something and that's a good positive thing you're trying to imitate and learn something >> but then if for example you want see something and start having negative emotions towards it. You want to have this guy is nothing. We do we didn't waste he's not even that good-looking. How is he getting thousand likes? That negative emotions that hatred that I feel is the wrong thing.
(34:52) So when you have something appreciate the other person and take the good things from it incorporate some things as well. Mhm. >> But now uh for example whatever social media is good or bad it is again changing so fast now we had uh 1 minute shorts then it became 30 secondond res then next I don't know it might be a 10-second reel we don't know what's happening the dopamine it is so fast the pat the person has no idea how to analyze one reel before he completes analyzing understands and accept accepts one re there's already
(35:30) three four reels that have been swiped up. >> Yes. >> So there is nothing that positive is going on with the swiping >> and in our generation we used to have newspapers and magazines. I still feel that is the best way to go. You're calm, you're sorted and in the present moment we call that mindfulness. >> There's a page, there's an article, read it, understand it, grasp it.
(35:54) >> With the reals, there's nothing that is being grasped. like maybe oh the clothes that the person wore that makeup or the shoes oh that's like a one lakh watch oh that's a Rolex all that comparison so that's when you said comparison is dangerous I also feel it is true because recently I uh even obviously we all scroll social media I was just scrolling through I was looking for say a watch >> my I for some reason the algorithm was caught all of my next feeds were the most expensive watches in the world I get one watch Amani is wearing one Tom
(36:30) Cruz is wearing and these watches are what like 10 lakhs I one watch is 1 cr apparently so that's when you start >> you know comparison you wear say 10,000 watch is good enough for you for your status for your a class 10 student you don't need a Rolex >> come on you might be uh like 40 having your own company business a huge doctor yeah buy it from your own money that's beautiful but Now the goals is be becoming so materialistic I feel our goal is like to set a small clinic a small firm or a small business shop then
(37:10) let's grow it to say a building let's expand no it's all materialistic let's buy a Ferrari first forget Mercedes it's directly Ferrari and then the kids are also being trained in such a way like it's a lot of fake things that go on on Instagram as you Magna >> whatever an influencer shows it's not even his or hers it might be rented or just marketing branded for someone but the lifestyle is shown in a way cha life I'm in one day Goa I'm in one day in Sri Lanka one day in Bali >> and that's not normal no one does that
(37:46) unless they're travel enthusiasts or like you know celebrities or what so the kids these days I see a lot they're getting influenced by the lifestyle The demands that they want is becoming crazy. They're not asking Nokia or small phones iPhone. They're not asking the iPad, the normal tablet, iPad Pro. >> Like the Max.
(38:11) >> Yes. Yes. >> That attaching Max for everything. I want a phone Max. I want an iPad Max. I want a TV Max. So there is no normalization or standardization I feel where your age is this. this is all you're going to get. This is the best that we can give you. I might be a millionaire. I might be a daily wage worker but still while status whatever they can afford is what you can give.
(38:37) But the kids are expressing so much and then if they're not that is becoming an issue where we see as uh behavioral abnormalities or t temper tantrums. They're going uh berserk. They're breaking objects in the uh house. They're like threatening. eight an 8-year-old girl took a butter knife and put it through her throat recently and said >> yeah a case of mine recently and she said to the father for her birthday so that again is such a different tangent maybe the daughter was pampered maybe whatever it's fine but the limits
(39:17) are being crossed because she yeah she threw a party in that lavish hotel a fivestar hotel naka hotel in agawali along with that gift >> okay >> and if you don't do I'll do this and that's where we are seeing a lot of problems it used to be teenagers maybe but now sadly the age is coming down young kids such as 8 9 10 are having these behaviors and it's not normal this is not what 8-year-old or 10 yearear-old should do >> oh my god but uh another thing about social media suppose Uh now example like suppose um there's a real that says
(39:58) uh five aspects he's a narcissist like you're your husband is narcissist so algorithm picks it up and then five reels it's the same thing and now now I'm sitting oh my god I'm married to a narcissistic [snorts] person >> what am I supposed to do you know it builds up so even if it's not true just because of social media I'm starting to think all these mental health specialists Yes.
(40:24) So they're not very healthy. What do you think about these? >> See, uh, educational videos are good. >> I mean, we also do that and we also learned from a lot of our seniors and peers who used to do educational videos. But nowadays it has become like a fad. >> Uh, in a bad way I feel. For example, uh, take maybe a dermatologist.
(40:47) Okay, your skin is oily. Use this this this cream. Use this soap. They're just putting it out there. >> You have hair loss, use this shampoo. So, it's again medically okay, accepted or not is again a different legal issue. But education promotion is what I feel. >> Okay. >> And in this like you said, five features. It's not true.
(41:10) >> I cannot do a test in 5 seconds. It's impossible. And this is again for the hook to drag you in for the viewership. And yes there are so many tests that we do in our clinic. The psychologist does the psychiatrist does. These are like like proper uh you know clinical rating scales which have been thoroughly researched over the years and then they are put out in the world where we can use them.
(41:38) So without standardization and all these tools we cannot just say okay if I you are this if two you are this. No we use certain guidelines certain tests and assessments which are you know which have to be done by a professional >> not on social media by five things assess yourself and no but yeah it's like saying hey we do chronic pathological liar.
(42:01) >> I cannot brand a person. Yes. There's a term called pathological chronic. >> I lost because I did think of it. >> Yeah. And then narcissistic trait, domination trait, um or patriarchal, matriarchal. So it's not that easy. So they are uh guidelines. Get the person to us. We'll do the testing for you if you have those doubts.
(42:24) But then again, personality traits again it's not rocket science. >> You can assess in a person. If it is, everyone has traits. Even I might have certain narcissistic traits. Who doesn't? Every person will have certain good traits, certain bad traits. Now they're getting out of control in your daily life, your professional life, your family life.
(42:44) >> That is when you say, "Hey, you have a medical problem. You need to go to a doctor." But like I said, uh common things see the things are happening between boyfriend and girlfriends. the reals are there, the Google is there, the chat GBT is there, and then the girlfriend or the boyfriend coming up and saying, "Hey, I feel you're having this. I think we need to break up.
(43:04) " >> But like I said, that is not good. That's not legal. That's not even uh right. >> A medical licensed uh professional should be doing it, not Google or Chad, >> just influencers. >> Yeah. But again for fun if you take it as like a good in a sense of humor you're just doing it for fun that's okay you get some kick out of it a laugh but don't take it too seriously my goto home you know takeaway messages any real given by a non-medical professional please take it lightly don't take it to heart just have a good laugh at it and
(43:39) forget it >> I want to come back to parents you know parents But we are normal. We turned out good only make it a big deal. I know conversation I'm sure most kids would have had with their parents. So what do you think about this? >> I have it every day [laughter] with my parents.
(44:05) So again like I said generation wise they were stronger >> physically mentally uh even the like for example they used to we know work it out in the fields they used to be naturally you know suscepted to the diseases and immunity again just one example the hardships that they did for example they used to walk >> take a bus or cycle all that.
(44:34) So slowly slowly the lifestyle is changing. >> Now coming fast forward to 2026 we have Tesla self-driving cars. So forget even using your hands. So it takes an impact on the way we look at things the hardships psychologically, physically, mentally I feel. So the resilience I do agree older generations had it much better physically, mentally and a stress they would take it and yes maybe they would suffer keep it inside not go because psychiatrist especially in India psychiatry has been booming since I would say 20 maybe 2007 and 8 boom start now 15 especially area
(45:15) co era uh the referrals to psychiatry has increased but like I they talk to themselves among the relatives and again if it is kids and this I do still hear when the kids wants to go to the therapy. Yeah. >> So like I said one therapy a lot of parents 90% per se I think will be okay because they think but the moment we say okay maybe there is something there we need to go dig deeper because it's not like a blood test it's not like that we need to dig deep and deep so it takes at least four five sessions. So when we say mother father
(46:01) you know three four sessions for us to get a clearer picture then they start Blame the child. You're not emotionally strong. Again, the same thing which I told you. I used to walk 10 kilometers to the school. I used to go to the well, pick up water to shower. All those unnecessary comparisons are brought in to a topic which is not needed.
(46:35) Now the topic might be I'm getting bullied at school. >> That's such a different tangent. That's like not even related to my father walking 10 kilometers. It's not related. But the parents you know do that. So what we try to teach the parents is first understand the core concept then sorry if [clears throat] your child is not willing to go in a bus is not willing to walk or do the physical exercise then you can bring in p me example.
(47:01) Yeah >> you used to walk for you know 5 km to school or two shanki. So that is a good example but without having a clear knowledge of what it is just bring it in Jan and Jna good for you but it doesn't match the story but it is India we are going to be like that maybe in the future I might also tell my kids the same thing in 2022 26 >> I might because that's how we are it's our human pattern it's our wiring that I would say >> but parents unresolved trauma sometimes especially mothers do you think that passes on to the children like mental
(47:43) health issues >> like genetic bias >> a lot of things have genetic bias as well even in psychiatry be for example OCD >> anxiety stress a lot of females especially >> anxiety >> yeah so anxious personality disorder it has a genetic bias genetic basis especially Most statistics show like the women you know in the childhood again they had it it becomes a personality okay >> or then OCD it's lifelong it can be you know the intensity might be brought down >> over the years because you train your habits or your body and your mind but if
(48:23) it is not treated it becomes a chronic thing and your children might see you behave that way >> for example OCD uh okay there's dust here you keep on cleaning saying it over and over and you wash your hand times like after eating a meal. Now you being a kid who five years or sixes what would you think >> that is normal? You don't know that is abnormal needles naggles because we know now but at the age of five six you don't think that's and you try to mimic hey my mom watches her aunts I think that is correct >> then certain things okay when the other
(48:58) people in the household say okay you as a child shouldn't be doing that many times you ask why >> now the parents don't know how to explain the why >> now if they knew how to explain the why it would be so much easier for the child to understand they'll be like a punishment then that fear sets in. They don't know why the mother is doing it.
(49:19) They think it is normal but they are not allowed to do it. >> Okay. >> So if there's a genetic thing for example everyone has some carriers genetic preloading and genetic carriers like everyone might have a cancer gene. >> Yeah. So not everything is activated but under certain you know situations or environments or stressors it it is triggered and it activates or it is exemplified.
(49:45) >> Okay. So now even in this condition chin punch now the daughter is in a teenagers the parent the mother didn't change she's not getting help still few traits might aggravate or get triggered maybe the anxious thing might start getting triggered she starts getting fearful she gets worried and the OCD thing starts in many different ways the daughters try to hide their anxiety or cope up with it by over cleaning their room >> okay So the patterns increase to cover the anxiety.
(50:19) >> Okay. >> Why is my mother doing it? What's wrong with my mother? So 14 15 these things you know come out. Then the pattern is seen. >> Okay. The mother is there, the daughter is there. Then the family members start thinking the genetica. >> Okay. >> Like I [snorts] said it can be genetic but a lot of these behaviors are brought on by the like what you call the society or the environment.
(50:41) >> Okay. Okay. >> Environmental factors are very important. They pick it up. >> They pick it up very early as young as 3, four. You clean, you clean a certain way. I can guarantee you your four-year-old child will mimic it in the certain way. For example, there's a swab, there's a circle motion, then the square motion, everything will be copied by the child in that fashion.
(51:04) >> So that way, >> yeah. So since we're talking about women particularly, but like mental health issues, it goes on and on. uh it could be teenagers, PMS, you know, PMOS now. >> Yes. >> And uh also postpartum pregnancy, so many things. So how would you talk about women's mental health particularly >> women's mental health is very very important.
(51:32) I would say sadly a lot of people don't understand that and like you said so this I get a lot from my female clients as well because they might be having severe disturbances during the PMS cycle or they might be you know the ovelation cycle or everything whatever menstruation is very difficult for them >> the mothers also >> but sadly that's what I feel everyone in the household needs to be educated even the males >> because they don't know what's going on when it's a gyneic issue they try to sh you know run away >> or don't even want to know about it they
(52:11) say okay to the wife >> or her whatever the females in the house take care of this issue >> now mental health in the women it encompasses so many things >> be it from small small things such as anxiety marital stress >> college stress school it's starting as young as 14 12 14 >> then marriage then you know financial then job they have to balance so many things and in that managing the body is also something that they need to take care of >> age wise there's so many things >> women may have diabetes as early as 20s
(52:47) and 30s these days cholesterol is increasing weight gain hair loss acne you know with stress there's so many things that people don't know >> stress and lack of proper sleep for a women can affect the skin color, the quality, the hair fall, hair density, then the acne. So this is just again what I'm saying the hormonal >> a lot of people think it is purely hormonal but they forget it is stress it is lifestyle again other things as well they might be smoking alcohol so many other things >> then uh >> proper sleep hygiene
(53:22) >> have all these things lifestyle wise then these things will also help you >> medication is not the only thing medication along with you know lifestyle modifications self-help techniques help so many things >> and the other thing we need to help out in the women thing is they're not brought to the hospital soon.
(53:40) >> Yeah. >> They brought in the last last stages the males come faster. >> Okay. >> At least this Yeah. If the male has stomach issue is what you call I'm having a beer or a glass of whiskey every day. Very good. Go. Women they have this for months and months till they don't show up to the hospital. Either it be like ignorance, lack of education and then again people in the house also double blood test scanning minimum local shop is what they give is again whatever they say pain gas tablet that's
(54:26) it >> so the underlining thing is pushed and pushed to a stage where it is so so serious last came on for example there's a uterus issue or a fibroid or something we have to do a surgery. >> So if it was identified before it would have treated been treated in a very easier way, very minimalistic financial way without being a burden emotionally also.
(54:49) Now the mother or the person has to go through it so much. >> So this is just one example. Now coming to medical example imagine psychiatric >> psychiatry is pushed first push pushed till it becomes so bad >> and they are unable to handle that person in the home >> it is when and I'm not even kidding me last two three months a lot of cases were bought by the children >> and I'm like why didn't the husband come why did your brother come no they didn't want to come >> the this is mostly again if you see those SCS and soio economic status and mostly from the lower middle class at LA
(55:32) this is the thing the kids are fighting with the father and bringing the mother to the psychiatrist or the hospital for a general checkup forget psychiatric first a general checkup psychiatric I think about the fight so after the kids fight because these genz kids are now psychoeducated or they know okay psychiatry just mandul zombie chamom there's actual medical facts that we do you know that it is helping >> so the kids are bringing and I feel so so good >> but that you know the children are becoming more proactive in the family
(56:06) small signs we are you know we the children are catching me video five signs you might be having this in a good way it is helping these kids to at least identify hey my mother be might be having you know some problem >> she might be depressed She might be having insomnia, sleep disorder, something. So let's get her checked.
(56:27) So that is one thing is improving. But yes, the women's mental health needs a lot lot more. I feel the government also needs to step up. The awareness campaigns needs to be stepped up. Private uh hospitals can do much better job. The government I think hand in hand and again social media, news media. >> Yes.
(56:51) M so that way you know that is the goal to go into the deeper deeper parts the tribals the villages and tell them look this is this disorder at least the basic one like how you say chest pain go to a cardiologist get your ECG done something like that the small small thing small flyers need to be put out saying these things our mental health or neuros >> but more than that I think the men they need to be uh educated on this because most of the time like female if she's screaming or if she's you know angry it is flagged like okay she's hormonal PMS periods
(57:40) it's not always like that right so I think men need to be more educated on this >> definitely see that's why now coming into this generation. I feel it needs to start at a school level. >> Yeah. >> You know, we used to have school of uh if you remember social sciences, civic science, economics, then we used to have a moral science class.
(58:02) So, moral science class, they used to teach about these things. Okay. If you have a fight, how would how you should respond? court voted on Gaza you know deescalate the situation find out what happened and then report it to the teachers or principal. So moral science class taught us that now coming to this science class there needs to be something you know more about you know uh explaining the kids at a young age what is happening with the biology.
(58:32) It doesn't have to be just fever, cold, cough explain. There needs to be women classes for the at least you know kids who are at 12 13 age getting the periods for the first time [snorts] how to handle that cycles. It's not easy for them. They don't know what it is. They don't know how to wash up or maintain their hygiene.
(58:52) So hygiene needs to be taught. They need to be taught it's nothing wrong. So these things mental health they can maybe you know start few sections saying we don't have to go all out we can just be like if your mother is crying >> or if your father is crying continuously he's drinking a lot tell your teachers tell your relatives at where someone a third party can help out or identify the issue and give the proper treatment.
(59:18) So it can be the basic things or it can be like you know anger issues, physical abuse. Number one thing that I would say I've seen a lot is even molestation these days. >> So those things needs to be taught. Good touch, bad touch. >> You know it's done by family members >> statistic wise and even in my hospital I've seen lot of the girl childs are molested very sadly by their own family relatives, the uncles, the mamas, the chichas.
(59:50) So and that goes so so so you know unexposed. >> We need to explain the kids what it is. >> When now I had a case recently uh she's 22 23 now. >> Now papam she's having traumatic dreams >> and this happened when she was 8 and 10 years old apparently >> living in her hometown where the uncle used to live in the above house. So every day he used to come down sleeping paraka he used to do these illicit activities and the girl didn't know about it.
(1:00:23) This went on for few months she didn't know and then when she got older she knew what it was and it became a stage where she couldn't even tell anyone >> father chip the mother chip. >> So now she's 22 23 now she's having nightmares and traumatic flashes of her childhood for certain reasons. Uh it uh it was so random that she saw a movie or a TV show on >> Yeah.
(1:00:46) >> Netflix and Atlantic seen her chin in that >> and that triggered her >> in a very bad way. So anxiety started you know negative thoughts blaming herself self harm she started punching the walls >> because of this she couldn't sleep. Then she came to us now we're doing the therapy. >> Now she has accepted it.
(1:01:07) We made it a point now >> so that she was brave enough. She went and told her mother >> and her father this. >> Yeah. >> This happened like you know so many years ago. Surprising you know what the father said. The mother was shocked but she accepted. The father is still denying. God >> the father is still like and the audacity he said you dreamt about it in your dreams.
(1:01:33) >> My god >> because you are eight. What do you know? And the father still doesn't agree for it. But whatever the bra, you know, the brave thing is the girl stood, you know, took a stance. She went and faced them >> uh the person who did it and the family because of you and then now she's little bit better, more confident.
(1:02:00) But yeah, these are the sad things that go on a lot. So that's why I'm saying right mental health starts from the home. >> Yeah. >> Women's mental health starts from schooling and it has to be very very young age. >> But you know parents if a young girl is going through something she'll be fine. But what will happen to her marriage if she gets into it in this situation? >> It's a very tricky situation.
(1:02:29) See uh marriage is in a way good >> uh sometimes it does good things companionship that uh the confidence that someone is there to you know have your back and all but if there's a serious issue with the person be it whoever the girl or the boy I would say solve it first >> then get into a marriage you don't want to carry that baggage into the relationship beat whatever Now again I would like to advocate the lot of like now this coming back to your previous question psychiatry under taboo they don't want to come to the doctor
(1:03:09) why because of when they're 15 16 or 22 they get labeled and then they hide it >> yes the treatment might be still going on be it for example the boys bipolar or schizophrenic he's treated remission zero symptoms He's like near perfect in his family life, his daily life and office. They know for sure schizophrenia by plant is a huge huge it's a black dot but he's fine.
(1:03:44) So they try to say he's they cover it up basically. Then after some time the wife will obviously every day 24 hours low at least once you will notice some change. >> Yeah. He might have one bad day where he might act very differently or he's taking certain pills. He's going to say, "I'm taking vitamins. I'm taking my, you know, supplements or neuromds.
(1:04:04) " At some point, the wife is going to start questioning and doubt and then she's going to catch that tablet sheet and be like, "Hey, what is this? I'm going to Google it. Oh, it's lithium. Oh, it's for bipolar. Oh, psychiatry." Everything is gone. Everything is like it's a war zoning. very very bad scenes out there and this is very common.
(1:04:25) So now and coming to this if it's mentally like a psychiatric patient or be it anything it can be autoimmune disorder it can be a obesity case or a cancer patient whatever hiding is not good but now again marriage again is not the solution. So coming back to you marriage. Now what are the situations we see there? It can be number one the guy the girl is little bit a free bird.
(1:04:55) >> She likes to argue with her father. She gets her way like a tomboy. So what we say the guy will take care of you. Second, uh there might be okay relationship that the girl has already been in which the family is not okay with be intercast or a love marriage. Then they break it up and then this falls into place before someone else gets to know about it and your options for future matches are gone.
(1:05:26) Or third, it is in the culture. A lot of communities have where the girl is married at the age of 18 19 the you know the education is stopped their career is stopped the job is stopped and it becomes a housewife role or a homemaker so again the internal but coming to is it right or wrong it's a personal thing it's a communal thing community and societal thing but yeah what I would say is be it a marriage at 18 be it a marriage at 25 hell you can marry at 50 that's your wish but the maturity needs to be there the emotional maturity are you mature enough to marry
(1:06:05) because now I have a few cases they're both first relationship they didn't have any previous boyfriend or girlfriend or a dating thing now they put into a marriage arranged now they're fighting for everything they don't know how to handle the other person's emotions first of all emotion handle they're expecting or expected to handle the other person's as well.
(1:06:29) >> Yes. >> So that is not going to happen. So that's why you need to be mature enough, emotionally mature to handle your own emotions first. And when you're ready for marriage, you'll know. >> And if you're ready, go for it. It's a very beautiful thing. Yes, it is like a roller coaster.
(1:06:47) It'll have its ups and downs, but unless you're ready. If you have a baggage, if you have certain things in your life which uh are not going to be solved immediately, deal with them first. Tawata go into the marriage because unnecessarily you don't want the other person to know later. Tarvata being in India, it's going to be a family family drama.
(1:07:10) It's going to be a mahabharat and then everyone's going to come to the psychiatrist uh family package or whatever. But then it becomes really tough to deal with it. But then again, marriage is good. Being pressurized is not good. >> Yes, >> that's what I would feel. >> I want to talk about the epidemic most countries are labeling as one loneliness.
(1:07:33) We are supposed to be the most connected uh generation and they we could be surrounded by so many friends and yet feel alone. So what do you think about that? >> It is very true. I mean loneliness is it's it's been there since generations and centuries. It's nothing new but coming from this generational aspect it is definitely on the rise based on the data and the statistics that we have now we are what we call this is a hyperconnected world be it the social media the digital and the physical it's hyperconnected and in that sense what is
(1:08:10) happening is due to certain things loneliness anxiety depression is increasing >> now it can be multifaceted think reasons. It's not just one. We cannot just blame uh digital media and all. Yes. Go to the school, go to the walk, talk to people, social activities, social living was there, play in a group sport, play, you know, go to the movies together, go to the hotels and restaurants and even pubs together.
(1:08:39) But now everything you do it solo. You watch on a TV, on a phone, it's solo. You can't have an iPhone and have 10 people watch it together. It's not possible. Now games, everyone's onto the playing video games. Again, that is one thing. Uh again, community events are decreasing. Then coming back to the other previous question, comparison, >> yeah, >> confidence is coming down.
(1:09:06) They want to be happening wearing Gucci, Armani, whatever. They don't have it. They don't want to go to that party. So now if you have that for example Gucci bag then only I want to go to that party. That's how you're fixing your mind because certain X Y Z people are going to be there from that social status.
(1:09:26) I don't want to be compared. I don't want to be small. >> That is also one thing. So avoidance behavior is happening a lot I feel. And then coming back to the spectrum they think they're happy alone but no one is going to be happy alone. I feel you. It's an it's a mirage. It's a facade. It's a temporary thing. So I would say being loneliness being happy it's good for certain days but on the long run it's never good and loneliness happiness is good or I am happy being lonely.
(1:09:58) It's a false statement. Never believe anyone who says that I feel. >> But what about these parents particular parents cities or they left here alone. So that is another level of loneliness I feel. Very good question Magna the thing again Indian society we were always a joint society joint families now it's all nuclear nuclear no one is playing staying in the same place for long it's like jumping you are in Bangalore then next month you're in Hyderabad next month Delhi next one different country so state a state I mean like a physical state
(1:10:34) you'll have that consistency a good group of people lifestyle like habits rhythm or like same thing activities you do in a way which keeps you grounded. >> Yes. >> Now such speed things such hyperconnected things nothing is going to keep you grounded. >> So it is working for the current generation. Okay.
(1:10:56) You're that hyper you're that uh what do you call hip and happening very good but the older generations it's not going to be happening even with age. Now yes parents are going to be left alone. If you have the financial backing, if you have the capacity, yes, you can keep them in your home. Uh hire a caretaker or nanny and you know they're with you >> taking care in your house and you can do your thing.
(1:11:21) Go to your office morning, take care of own kids. But if that's not feasible, grandparents or sorry the parents or the grandparents are you know voluntarily choosing to go back to the native places >> now it is good also I feel. All friends circle that sense of togetherness or safety is always there. City low grand aged person I would say grandparents or no person about 60 70 said I am happy or I feel safe.
(1:11:51) No one especially in the high-rise apartments it is good kam in the country at least evening every day 6:00 they come down they walk or they have that gatherings but nothing is the same as their hometowns now sadly in this world in this lifestyle generation it's not going to happen but if you are financially able to definitely hire a caretaker or a medical nurse and the parents can be there and just once in a go do visit them as much as possible.
(1:12:22) Send your cricket kids your you know so that they have that grand grandparents grandchild union as well and uh see how it works. I'm not saying this will work for everyone. Do what works for you. Try it. But leaving parents alone not taking care of them sadly again salary reasons we cannot blame anyone. It can be so many reasons.
(1:12:46) Uh so I work with the gediatric uh rehab as well in kukat paliki atula and duro where it's a home senior living assisted living so we have apartment style each uh person has its own room male female couples go to naru >> husband wife they have a couple room two beds side by side and we as doctors we provide nursing home like the caretakers and we are providing 24/7 okay >> and then the same thing uh Morning we do some exercises physiootherapy.
(1:13:17) Evening they come sit in the venda parking lot and then they have the games and sports. So I felt that is a very good uh you know initiative that the company has taken. Uh it's an Chennai based company. >> Okay. >> And they did a fantastic job the hygiene the medical care. Uh I recently joined the organization because I was tied up with a few others.
(1:13:41) Uh sadly for whatever reasons again. So you offer mental health to them? >> Yes, we offer all. It's like assisted living. There are medical sugar BP patients who are paralysis patients, neuro patients, mental health patients would like old age again there's dementia cases which are there Alzheimer's dementia. So that is majorly seen in old age.
(1:14:04) So they are so uh affected mentally they don't even remember the kids faces anymore. They don't even know how to brush their own teeth. Those are severe cases. We have two or three of those. So for them we have assisted packages where you know nurse 24/7 then the nurse takes care of the patient and kids could they're coming every weekends they come spend 2 three hours with them.
(1:14:27) It's like a mini community. So I think that is something initiative if we take like we can do it our own community. We don't even have to start a company for it. society neighborhood law if you have neighbors Saturday we can be like let's all sit together for 1 hour >> get the old people out >> okay >> it can be randomly assigned to whoever has the biggest house in the neighborhood who has a garden just put a chairs carum boards should start ji just to start ji play even you know or some cards that is good cognitive exercise good community bonding and that's like a
(1:15:04) social responsibility that we can Yes, >> as citizens. >> So I believe that is something that we can do if you don't have the time just with your neighbors start once a week >> and you know that'll be like a get together also a small kitty party for the seniors. >> I know we spoke about everyone parents women but we missed [snorts] out on the larger uh part of our audience which are men.
(1:15:30) >> We never talk about men's mental health. So how do you address that? >> So the beauty with meni they are coming out more nowadays. In my own practice I've been practicing for like 13 14 years. It was very hard to convince a man saying okay n problem he knows okay let's just take uh financial issues he starts drinking now he has depression stress and alcohol addiction see you have this boss come on let's start somewhere he does not agree to it that he has a problem
(1:16:14) >> denial was number one issue unless his liver got damaged his kidneys got damaged sugar spike he's forcefully admitted in the ICU is when the change would be brought on >> or uh family members would forcefully bring the person and admit in a deaddiction center or a rehab but now people are especially men or voluntarily and that is very beautiful to see it might be a very small problem it might be a huge problem they are coming forward and saying I feel something wrong, I want to get it checked.
(1:16:52) >> Okay. >> And please tell me if there's something wrong with me. >> And that is how we start. And that is >> the men or younger. >> Uh it is all age groups. >> Okay. >> The gentleman who came last like this on his own without his wife's knowledge was 60 plus. >> Yeah. because of his stress he was having BP fluctuations and all title on Instagram not mine someone else's but linking mental health and uh blood pressure he said I didn't even go to my cardiologist doctor I came directly to a psychiatrist which was very good so Idi
(1:17:30) and but again it is very true and men don't cry that often men hide their emotions because they are the foundation for the family they are the uh the element of the face. So they have to put put up this brave front, confident front and again they're human at the end. Some people are yes stronger, more emotionally resilient and uh easy to not easy sorry very hard to break.
(1:17:58) Some people are you know weak emotionally less confident. They're very anxious easy to emotional uh you know distress. They can't handle pressure that easily. they break easily. There's nothing wrong in it. uh the mal you know the statement is oh I'm not man enough in moonic again I would say that is you know garbage to be honest every person is different every male female everyone is different so all have the pros all are the cons now coming to openness the fear is there >> number one fear doctor >> so that is where now we are openly
(1:18:38) saying that is not how we proceed yes we do the testing we do the medical labs we do the psychological labs we do the counseling yes when the medication is needed open you can also discuss with your doctor which tablets you want to use which you don't want to use then we try to you know make a system where you are happy I'm happy middle ground and definitely 1 month 2 months try cheddar low in tapu >> see people are afraid to use psychiatric medications my question to everyone out there is why are you not afraid of using
(1:19:10) the BP medications. Why are you not afraid about using audu? Everyone is on the injections. Ompic everyone has side effects >> or take a do almost every day. >> Exactly. There every tablet has a side effect. You Google it up. >> Yeah. >> Now ompic had so many side effects. Where did that go? Where did the fear go? Everyone ran to the hospital saying I want the shots.
(1:19:34) And trust me, there was a shortage. At one point in Hyderabad there was a shortage of vigori oric because so many people took it off label without the prescriptions without the doctor's authorization as well. Now yes every injection every medication has its pros and cons. Now we are the experts. We being MBBS and MD and DMs we know when to stop the medication.
(1:20:01) If the patient is really in distress or side effects are very bad, we stop and then we alter, we change. No tablet is perfect. So the same way uh we uh started off with our older medications but now the research in neuro and psychiatric and neuroscychiatric field is going so fast europlow new new tablets are coming out without the side effect profiles of before. Yes.
(1:20:27) >> Now, yes, we do still use medications which were invented in 1970s, which were found in 1980s, uh, and they still work good, but again, they might not suit you. >> They might suit someone, but we need to do the trial for that. But now, a lot of people are preferring the new ones like the second genum, third generation medications which were recently found 2010.
(1:20:50) >> Yes. >> Post 2020, 2020. So those drugs are having more less side effects. But then again, everyone has its own favorite. I might like biryani from say one hotel, you might like it from another hotel. So it's personal preference also at the end. But uh as a normal person to a doctor you know about these drugs the medical u you know I mean mental health psychiatric pills or um too like you'll get addicted you'll act like a zombie so much goes online and people talk about it but how far is it true everyone so scared of these I like how
(1:21:31) you brought it up >> what do you think like why are people so scared about it >> because number one I feel it was portrayed in the oldest cinemas, oral media, print media and it was it is true. I mean the way the severe like I said the ignorance, lack of awareness severe condition and then we had to do severe treatments for it.
(1:21:58) For example, there's a cardiac patient who had a stroke emergency. We do stenting and all all those cardiac interventional procedures. Why do you do it? We do it because it is needed. Yes. And there are high-end procedures. It's not like a small uh open things are not open bypass surgeries are not a small thing. It's lifethreatening also.
(1:22:17) But we do it because we need it. So rao psychiatric patients dr and in that terminal condition we had to do very you know very dangerous techniques or very uh interventional techniques also for example ect >> which is shock therapy. simple words slow law shock treatment electroconvental therapy and and then it used to be in the US law and all the European countries have even more severe uh things where they had to lobotomy and lobotization.
(1:22:49) So they used to take a small needle and a hammer and you know through the nose and go into the brain and pick one point where the emotional center and the frontal lobe at they tap it and the needle goes and that damages that uh you know neuronal center in the brain just the patients used to be zombies.
(1:23:07) It's like almost destroying a part of the brain. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> And the brain stops functioning and then high doses would the older drugs severe drugs powerful ones you had to sedate him. You had to make him a zombie for say per there's a good case studies if ever you have time please visit Google there long long stories from 1950s and '7s asylums US law mental asylums very fascinating intriguing stories so for example there's a serial murderer who had murder at least murdered 20 30 people now how would you treat such a person or control such a person So he
(1:23:45) had to be put on very very high doses and they had to zombify him because of worry where he would kill a guard. >> Okay. >> Okay. Female nurse neck snap just and these people Americans as you know Caucasians or be the African-Americans they're huge. The height the built the body physical structure is very different from us Indians.
(1:24:08) So they can you know break a neck a in a second laga. So out of fear or out of necessity we had to do it and then became media. The movies the Alfred Hitchcock uh the black and white cinemas the murder dramas are the people started you know imagining psychiatry only as limited to that. Okay >> only pul treat just and again picholu is such a very vague word.
(1:24:32) >> See you can have anxiety we treat it. You can have insomnia we treat it. That doesn't mean you're mentally ill. You know those are behavioral or like physiological things that the brain is going through. So coming to this over the period of time again awareness and all happened in the US >> FDA approval under the FDA is again food drug administration which author like gives a green signal this is safe you can use it.
(1:24:59) >> Yeahanti drug >> it's not like we use some you know magical treatments from the pharmacy company. No, we use all standardized uh good you know good imported products or domestically made like you know there's so many Sunfarma uh big famous brands Atlante so now the image has changed now movies there's so many movies Shah Rukh Khan did a movie where is a psychiatrist >> uh so tears in the key >> yeah so I there's so many nice size movies where you portray the psychiatrist not as a villain giving shock only or even Now injection do you
(1:25:39) see they poke it in the needle press person fails. So all these things you know are you know don't happen that easily these days. So the image is changing the fantasy is changing. We are no longer the the devils or the danger doctors. We are also you know pleasant people. We are also good soft people. So awareness again, news media, uh, social media, digital media, everything is having an impact positively.
(1:26:08) Everything will have a negative impact as well. But now I see openly I can say positivity overwways or overshadows the negatives and that is good for the for everyone in fact >> but you uh specialize in something called as TMS if I'm not wrong which most of us haven't heard of. So now how I started with uh there were a lot of techniques like oldite ect then came many many interventional techniques because they were experimenting in a whole lot of way lobotomy on day there were other techniques also with giving high infused
(1:26:41) sedation low they try to mimic changes in the brain. So now these techniques what are happening in the research wise new is called neuromodulation. >> Okay. >> So neuromodulation techniques now we have ketamin therapy. Ketamin is again a drug, anesthesia drug uh that is used for anxiety and uh depression.
(1:27:03) So again it's feared by a lot of patients because they Google anesthesia oh anesthesia drug will I die or will I take it? I will not wake up from that sleep. Uh so these things are there but these are research to calm down the brain or bring the chemical changes into your brain. We are forcing them with these chemicals and trying to stabilize or normalize.
(1:27:24) So shock therapy is electrical current which goes to the brain and you know we try to stabilize the chemicals and it is beautiful. ECT is very safe. We give it again with anesthesia. Older times they used to give it directly and directly they used to hold down the patient put a rubber thing so that tongue is not bitten and directly temple or scalp mida two electrodes and then past current.
(1:27:52) It was again Starting low very high voltage patient would be brain fried or all that but this again 1900s world war time slow then the technology or research increase now we know the current in the exact point we know how to give the dosing of the current and it's very safe >> it's beautifully used in patients with severe suicidal ideation aggression pathological self harm patterns to themsel or others severe aggression bipolar So instantly patient cool down that is a very beautiful technique.
(1:28:26) >> Okay. >> Now with research we have come to RTMS or TMS which is again transcranial magnetic stimulation. >> Okay. So the same thing electrodes certain electricity these waves resonating magnetic waves or something to it's like a helmet the other things are like electrodes where we place on the brain the technician or the doctor or the you know neuroscientist does it and it's like a 15 to 20 minute procedure >> so then we identify the regions of the brain it's not like think of this as a brain I cannot get everywhere
(1:29:00) >> so it has to be certain areas of the brain where I give frontal prefrontal contact, dorsal lateral contact, prefrontal cortex and atla. So we identify those regions and we put those uh electrodes and they pass those waves. You just have to you know sleep just close your eyes and relax music and then you just have to relax.
(1:29:23) Sometimes there might be certain sensitive people that wave causes tingling sensation passing because it is literally like a ring you know current passing through your brain and your nerves. So that tingling sensation people are sensitive then we have to identify why then we decrease the dosing or we don't give it a lot new new techniques are coming now we have deep TMS which is like a proper helmet you just put it on your helmet uh enter the settings >> this is just to balance the chemicals >> yes and it is basically identify for
(1:29:53) what reason you're giving so for deepms we give it for depression anxiety kota research is coming out for smoking session addiction patterns but we use it more for uh depression and anxiety and OCD. >> That's so cool. >> Yeah. So, it's like a helmet. You just wear a helmet, you sit for 20 minutes, you close your eyes, relax.
(1:30:14) And that's the latest technology right now. >> Okay. >> Deep TMS. It's expensive as well, but it's very easy. You just enter the settings, you know what to do, select your areas and press start, and the machine does the work for you and but the doctor or the technician or the staff nurse has to be there just to see nothing bad happens and which is very very rare.
(1:30:34) So a lot of changes in this department is happening. So it is called neurom modulation. >> Okay. >> We are trying to modulate the things chemically in the brain the neuro. >> So lot of things will come up in the future. Definitely in maybe next 5 years or 10 years you will see new new machines coming up new new techniques coming up.
(1:30:54) There's also a surgery where we do the neurosurgery team you know for severe cases where there's movement disorders or like neuro disorders. uh we implant a small chip DBS deep brain stimulation movies chip we implant it into the brain region >> brain okay >> so that is to conduct or modulate on the own so where the movements exactly if it's like involuntary like jerks you're unable to control so that chip in a way you know modulates it or the you know regulates in the certain region to stop the movement >> okay so it chala chala wonderful
(1:31:28) researches are going on >> so cool what you just mentioned about TMS. So, doctor, but can you really be honest? Do people actually get better or they just learn like pattern or do they actually get better? >> So, a lot of it depends on the person I feel. Like for example there was an accident you lost your legs you get your you know artificial implants you get your thing but you need to have that willpower to do the physiootherapy to do that work yes you can walk again you can run again >> recently movie the same thing you need to have that
(1:32:13) determination to do something that willpower is innate it is different for you different for me but somewhere you need to you know even if it is not there you need to bring it and we do it from a third party like the doctor, the counseling, the psychotherapy. So we call it CBT, cognitive behavioral therapy.
(1:32:35) So we try to you know teach the person his behavioral changes and you know patterns which will bring about a positive change. The goal is you know for example the goal is to bring certain change. You have to do certain things a to get that zed change. >> Okay. Okay. For example, anxiety, you have a stage fear. >> So, we will try to, you know, expose exposure therapy or something like that.
(1:32:58) Then we try to give you the confidence. Then we start giving you the mic. We start pushing you, you know, talk first best friend. Talk in front of your parents. Then start the small crowd. Talk in front of your school assembly. Then talk in front of the camera. These we are trying to break the patterns and give that confidence.
(1:33:15) But the person should also be participating in it. And yes when you do all these things definitely that Z goal which is speaking confidently in people in front of people like 100 giving a lecture in front of a class or even a crowd >> it becomes very easy and yes Danta assisted we do medications comes in anti-depressant anti-anxiety medications uh all these things to help the starting stages they might not be permanent but at least for the first four months you're going through therapy and you're trying to modify yourself low we give the medications to calm you.
(1:33:50) When you're calm, you do that activity. If you're not calm, you can't do that activity >> for sure. >> If you're like shaking like this, you can't even, you know, stand in front of a stage or hold a mic or even talk properly. You're going to stutter. You're going to stammer. So those things all are look at it's a holistic treatment.
(1:34:11) But people definitely do get better. I would say 80 90% for sure overall holistically if you approach the treatment be it psychiatry neur neurology also we work together with all the departments we work with medicine we work with neurology neurosurgery and we are the psychiatry or neuroscychiatric department then we work with the psychology department as well so overall if you say serious cases would take I won't lie uh we call it treatment refractory or some rare cases which even with medication patients or doing all the procedures nothing works. They are
(1:34:44) the you know sadly the most serious of the serious cases. >> So for example you must have heard antibiotics >> resisted treatment resistant. So TB treatment resistant anti-TB or this psych we have certain cases where it is so bad the person is delusional for so longer treatment for example the ghost goes away in the morning.
(1:35:22) Yeah, >> that is so you know rigid and every day has been put on to you and no one helped you for whatever reason sadly you didn't get the right treatment it becomes almost like permanent >> okay >> and for this person now if in 50s 60s uh comes up to us and says we'll definitely help we'll definitely do our ECTs our RTMS our our antisycchotics and all those treatments and therapy but it becomes very hard they might be improvement But they may not be also 100% deployment.
(1:35:56) So that is something that we'll have to live with. We Atlantic parents in family members coach how to deal with certain how to make it better situational how you can also as a family member because we won't be there 24/7. So we teach the parents, we teach the caregivers or the family members what to do in certain situations if the patient is uh very very out of control Ga.
(1:36:21) But because of lifelong and they have to live with it sadly but like any other disease medical or surgical even psychiat is the same we can treat it there are certain uh unavoidable circumstances where it becomes very hard for us to treat as well but like I said we don't give up there is always 100% commitment that we show and it is a chronic thing it can be a lifelong thing mental illness you need to understand is a journey >> it can be acute like say it can last for just few days, few weeks, it can be months, it can be years.
(1:36:57) >> Yeah. >> So that journey is what you need to be you know ready for and everything you know with the proper treatment goes very smoothly at least from what we see the new techniques that you mentioned the medications and therapy they're doing wonders. So everyone watching us right now um and feeling maybe I should also pay a visit to a psychiatrist.
(1:37:19) What would you tell them? >> I would tell please do not hesitate. Please do not take a break. If you are confused with who to reach out with, uh you can ask your friends and family. They are the best source because someone I guarantee you Magna someone must have visited a therapist or a psychiatrist or a doctor and nearby areas if you want Google the Google you can go to corporate hospitals nowadays majority not even majority I would say all the corporate hospitals have a psychiatry department so be the big ones like arit
(1:37:51) kims kamini yoda everyone has psychiatrist departments in it you can reach out there but to make it even more comfortable go to a doctor who your family or friends recommend. >> How do they find you? >> You can find me at Arit. You can find me at uh my clinic in Jibli Hills on Google.
(1:38:11) So, you can uh hit me up by my name on Google and I'm very easy to reach out. My my assistant in my clinic has my mobile number. Uh my corporate we have a call center. My assistants are there. So we are always available 24/7 beat 12:00 a.m. 2 a.m. >> It's amazing. >> Yeah. Thank you. We are readily available. Even a 2:00 a.m.
(1:38:33) call, we are ready to pick up because uh I bet I've been taught by my professor when I was a student. The first thing he told me was give your mobile number to your patient. We are like no why I want to sleep. I have a very hectic day. He was like no because we are psychiatry. What if a patient is standing at the you know edge of a building at say 2 or 3 in the morning and says I want to commit suicide because I lost my job or I was falsely framed in a criminal case by the police or whatever.
(1:39:05) That is when you pick up that call and give 30 seconds comfort like just comfort him >> reassurance >> reassurance comfort him be nice don't g no just whatever it is he will not have complete time to explain you his story but okay calm down just take a step back go to your bed drink water call your friend or give what we used to do is give your friends or spouses your family number and we used to call them from another number and be like chand babu or whatever is on the terrace please immediately go till that time we try to deescalate the situation and that
(1:39:40) was done in my early student days and that still sticks with me now and I've made it a routine by in my team or me or my juniors or whoever my colleagues we make it a rule that you have to take a call if it's a psychiatry because no one calls you say drun it is always going to be a serious call if they call you in the night >> yes >> and uh that is where uh uh we've been trying to do our thing and uh we do get a lot of calls and even the government has started national help lines like Tymanas if you know of Nimhans Bangalore
(1:40:15) there's Telman started by the Modi BJP government central government that is also 24/7 available but even if you don't get the correct response sadly sometimes it does happen >> the call is put on hold the call doesn't connect there's so many other things you can get like I said call the local doctors or like we are there available now.
(1:40:38) So do your information prior get the information through Google or family and friends and nearby hospitals help is always available and don't be shy to reach out. Number one rule is we keep things confidential. We do not if the clause is there if you say do not tell my parents and if you're like 18 major >> we do you know we are obliged to it we respect it but unless there is like threat to your life threat to safety and all then we are you know like you know we have to take that professional responsibility and inform someone because you are not doing well.
(1:41:11) >> Yes. >> So what we do promise is confidentiality. No one is going to know you came to us nor neither your best friends, your family if you want it that way. >> But I would encourage it to be open >> to share it with your you know family and friends because they are the best therapists first then we are the professionals for it.
(1:41:31) >> That is my message for everyone. >> Lastly, a very interesting question. If you had to put one sentence on uh billboards across Hyderabad about mental health, what would it be? Oh, tough one. [laughter] There's so many that come to mind. But one thing I would I would say is uh you're not alone. Maybe that is the pitch.
(1:41:59) Mental health, you have it. You are not alone. Everyone has their own story. Your own family or your own housemate, there will be one or two people suffering from mental health issues. your neighborhood, your office, co-workers, everyone has something or the other going on in their life. Be it medical problems, be it surgical, uh psychological, psychiatric.
(1:42:22) So don't think it's just you that you're alone. India is a big country. A lot of problems are there. Don't worry. >> That's amazing. Thank you so much for such an insightful conversation, Dr. >> Thank you so much, Ma. Thank you for having me over. >> Thank you. Thank you. >> Thank you. >> [music]
Author Name:Unscripted with Meghana Reddy
Youtube Channel Url:https://www.youtube.com/@UnscriptedMeghana
Youtube Video URL:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X81JjiNFtGo
Title: Why Are We Still Silent About Mental Health in a Telugu household? | Dr. Vishnu Gade | Unscripted
Author Name: Unscripted with Meghana Reddy
Description: Psychiatrist Dr. Vishnu Gade discusses mental health in a simple and practical way — from depression and teenage stress to parenting, social media, loneliness, women’s and men’s mental health, and modern psychiatric treatments.
We explore why people hesitate to visit a psychiatrist, how to differentiate sadness from depression, how social media affects emotional health, and why mental health education should begin at an early age.
⏱️ TIMESTAMPS
00:00 – Introduction
01:38 – Meet the Psychiatrist & Breaking Mental Health Stigma
04:30 – Why Did He Choose Psychiatry? His Journey Begins
08:20 – Mental Health Stigma in Families & Society
10:00 – Why People Hesitate to Visit a Psychiatrist
13:30 – Astrology vs Psychiatry: When Mental Health Gets Overlooked
15:41 – Sadness vs Depression: How to Tell the Difference
17:47 – Can Depression Improve Naturally? Lifestyle & Treatment
19:52 – Hidden Depression: Recognising the Warning Signs
23:42 – Academic Pressure & the Mental Health of Teenagers
28:18 – Parenting, Comparison & Supporting Children
31:37 – Why Social Media Is Affecting Emotional Health
33:49 – Social Media, Comparison & the Dopamine Cycle
39:53 – Mental Health Advice on Social Media: What to Trust?
47:35 – Can Parents Pass Mental Health Patterns to Children?
51:07 – Women’s Mental Health: PMS, Stress & Life Changes
57:20 – Mental Health Education Should Start in Schools
01:07:32 – Emotional Readiness & Loneliness
01:15:25 – Men’s Mental Health: Why Men Hide Their Emotions
01:26:20 – TMS, Modern Psychiatry & the Future of Mental Health
01:37:13 – Seeking Help & The Final Message: “You’re Not Alone”
#mentalhealth #psychiatrist #DrVishnuGade #depression #mentalhealthawareness #psychiatry #teenager #parenting #socialmedia #mensmentalhealth #womensmentalhealth #mentalhealthstigma #mentalhealthpodcast #tms #mentalhealthmatters
Transcript:
(00:00) To start off, you're a psychiatrist. Let's be honest, everyone likes the cardiologist, the neurologist, Gandhi Hospital in Second. Then I saw the hardcore cases, very sad one cases, children that changed my whole perspective in most psychiatrist. That's how they consider it. >> Even till date people cannot pronounce it correctly.
(00:32) They might say psychiatrist, psychiatrist. But China you know what they used to call us doctor. >> Most people might visit a astrologist before coming to a psychiatrist. Is that true? >> Marriage sadly is not going so smoothly. So the pujari comes suggests few pujas to be done but then again nothing happened and that was actually on the >> Telugu student particularly MZ IIT Chadali USL Pali Pali.
(01:01) So what does this kind of mapping do to a teenager brain? >> Now to start it off I would say I'm also part of this factory. >> Social media makes you want to compare your life with another person. I I think that's the worst thing for this uh generation in mental health aspect. What do you think? We never talk about [music] men's mental health.
(01:28) [music] >> The beauty with men [music] mental health, depression, anxiety, addiction last 12 mental health psychiatric specialist Dr.
(02:24) More importantly, depression, anxiety, de addiction is qualifications, philosophy, mental health. last option. Soal judge Thank you so much for joining with us on unscripted. How are you doing? >> Hello. Thank you Magna. I'm really good. How are you doing? Thank you for having me.
(03:06) >> I'm good, thank you. To start off, you're a psychiatrist wedding function relatives. >> So this is not just one function. It can be multiple like birthday parties or weddings or home pujas. But starting low, it used to be awkward. I mean maybe in like early 2010s or something when I was a student as well but gradually gradually you see the people change with their expressions and be like Mundo it will be like oh miss psychiatrist and she like oh wow miss psychiatrist so I feel the you know the people are getting
(03:43) more get to know about psychiatry as a medical subject >> and awareness is increasing uh thanks to social media the government and uh policy makers. So I think again like I said people like you also who are you know forefronting this so we are doing very good in that but related law still uh it is going to be a tricky task because let's be honest everyone likes the cardiologists likes the neurologists the physicians uh so when it comes to the other subjects say there is a little bit bias but then again people go with
(04:20) passion and their own personal stories >> uh So whatever it is now, I feel we're doing good. Better than 2010 for sure. >> Yes. But why mind? Why did you choose this part? >> So interestingly uh my aunt's a psychiatrist in Chicago. >> So then uh so I grew up with her as well. So she was a student of Usmania during her MBBS days and then uh they used to you know discuss with me you know we saw this case.
(04:51) I was very little. I wouldn't know anything but you know how we used to play doctor >> we used to have this toys the board games the lighting you know those kind of things so then it was always fascinating you know about it and then being from a doctor family I think it's since childhood not you know innately instilled like hey you have to be a doctor but constantly everyone around you talking about it e patient >> e you know discussion and all then you get dragged into it then I think when she also became a resident, >> okay,
(05:22) >> for psychiatry in the US. uh we used to you know connect on call and maybe Apuru as you know I think this was in the early 2000s okay landline and then again expensive calls international calls would be so expensive you would just have like hey 5 minutes you know that everyone in the house has to talk with the person >> so I remember that 5 minutes would be so awesome she' be like she the same thing again repeat okay I saw you know a bipolar patient today I saw a schizophrenic patient today I didn't know what it meant but the tourist you
(05:54) would say [snorts] you know their you know uh traumas their you know struggles and how that patient from then has become better maybe say 6 months later okay it was always fascinating to me and then when I went to med school uh again like I said psychiatry patients we wouldn't see a lot but we had a very good department so I was from Kamini medical college in Nipali alganda >> so we had a department I still remember a female PhD a postgradu student she was very interested to teach us classes how we were as students you know class
(06:32) but she used to make it a point to tell interesting cases or be like hey do your homework and come I'm going to tell you something better about this so that also piqu my interest I think and then I think I did my uh yeah I think it was an internship which I did in Gandhi >> okay >> Gandhi hospital in secundrabad then I saw the hardcore cases, the very sad ones, >> okay, >> the traumatic ones, then they were like traumatic abuse cases, children who would be like, you know, traumatic because of abusive parents, alcoholic
(07:06) fathers. I think that changed my whole perspective >> hearing all good stories >> like hey sunshine and rainbows >> then suddenly coming into the government hospital seeing like 20 30 patients every day and all were like one worse than the other >> it hits you at some point and then I did you know you are attached you're not allowed to treat them but you're attached to a doctor and you do the rounds with them you roam around and learn with them and do the whatever the extra internship roles.
(07:40) So then one case got so much better. I still remember they came to the hospital with one sweet box >> and I was rotated. I was in a different department. They came searching for me and my other friend uh and they came and gave that small sweet box. So that was a very sweet thing. And then I thought why not the mind because fever, cold, cough 3 days maximum 5 days, one week you do get better.
(08:04) mental health is so so chronic or longlasting sometimes it takes years and months and when you're on that journey with them you become a part of them yes >> or the family and it did feel really good and then when I think I took a decision that I'm going to go to the psychiatry route >> I'm so glad you did that >> uh but uh growing up uh mental health an was it a thing in your family did people talk about it >> uh not openly like I said Again it uh it still is a stigma >> because okay coming to this question yes in my relatives or in the family there
(08:40) were people who were not suffering directly with the severe cases but hey okay copund >> yes yes >> personality he's a very dominating person uh the you know a girl or the women in the family she's gets cranky very easily okay now medically looking back you could have thought hey maybe it's hormon maybe it's PM missing maybe somewhere maybe go to the gynecologist get a checkup so Atlanta but no one used to go everyone would be like in mani in >> so those kind of a things but yeah in the family they cases but now like when
(09:18) you asked Jinapur we didn't know >> and even while studying we didn't know to be honest but now that we know the subject we know how to identify so that's why we are here >> to identify to educate ate the people so that the things are not delayed and when things go out of hand >> and being from a doctor family also there are so many things we missed >> there might be hey go to the doctor sooner why don't you get yourself checked or at least assessed once but we didn't because even we wouldn't know >> I just got conscious that uh you would
(09:52) have judged my personality on all of it by [laughter] now >> no >> we are off duty sometimes [laughter] >> so coming back to mental health in most that's how they consider it. So what do you think about that? >> It is sad to be honest. Uh when I was like I said again interning uh we could see obviously people they're uneducated they wouldn't even know how to pronounce the word psychiatrist.
(10:25) >> Psychologist even till date people cannot pronounce it correctly. They might say psychiatrist, psychiatrist something like that but still but chinapuro you know what they used to call us doctor >> that's how it is. So then a mental doctor then again like I said education wise improvement or like psycho education or in the hospital okay this department deals with this you need to go there because you have an issue like this and then you know people got educated about it and now like I said it's getting better
(10:58) >> uh but uh still in the rural areas because we do our camps sometimes we go deep into the interior tribal areas and villages as well uh Then when you do say uh sorry we can say neuro >> to you know help or ease it out. Yes doctor we cover it up sometimes but the moment you say psychiatrist or mental health >> it goes the other way sometimes sadly it's not consciously but >> it does happen.
(11:33) I think most people cardiologist 25 year old you know a kid I mean a person parents cardiologist psychiatrist they feel hesitant. Yeah, that is true. uh then again like I said because of the stigma >> uh sadly I can uh openly say one thing if it is a teenager people are very hesitant >> you know for example especially if it's a girl the physician might say okay I have a doubt your daughter's going through terrible stress >> because the girl sadly will tell the doctor everything father mother >> so what happens is the disconnect is
(12:13) there the parents don't know what's happening with the child they believe everything's all right but then the physician identifies it first then he might refer to us the specialist. So once they come to us uh then we can dig a little bit more but the fear is once they do come to the hospital they feel they're branded.
(12:33) >> Yeah. >> Ohasari psychiat there's nothing wrong in it. It's just a checkup an assessment. There might not be anything necessarily wrong with the person but we are there to identify it. If it is there, yes. If it's not there, everyone's happy. But even for that prim uh the primary checkup, people don't want to show up because they are thinking they're getting branded.
(12:56) Oh, my daughter or son/ is uh a psychiatric patient. She's going to be a mental illness patient for lifelong. So these are the stigmas which we need to you know assess. Just one visit is not going to label you or brand you and it's not lifelong. And then again anything treated earlier is much better. For example, you come at say teenagers if you have an issue you don't treat it for multiple years it's going to be so bad.
(13:23) It's going to be very tricky and it's going to be very hard for us as doctors to treat it medically as well. >> Uh most people might visit a astrologist before coming to a psychiatrist. Is that true? Did it happen? It happened in a few marital cases because uh uh funny story it just happened like I think two years ago I think so it was an arranged marriage they went to their family astrologer numerologist whatever >> okay >> dantarawata whatever marriage sadly is not going so smoothly xy z reasons it can be so many
(13:58) multiple reason then they call back the the astrologer and say hey you said everything in the kundi is fine Now what is this happening? >> So the pujari comes and then he you know apparently suggests few pujas to be done, few mantras to be done. The woman has to go fasting for certain next days. The husband has to go to some temple in Ahmedabad somewhere and he has to do certain rituals and come back.
(14:26) Okay, they did all that but then again nothing happened. So again they had to come back to the you know like a proper doctor. Then again same thing they went to the family physician got referred to us at the hospital that's when we realized it was something actually important it was a you know bipolar case which was actually missed >> okay >> and that was actually on the boy's side >> so no one identified they try you know sadly blaming the wife >> she was a house housewife maybe because she's not doing certain things correctly
(14:56) she's not taking care of the household or the husband correctly and uh the household is not correct but what was missed is the husband had childhood teenage bipolarity. >> Okay, >> mostly we call it cyclic >> uh depression which means few months he'll be all right, few months he'll have the depression phases where he might be very cranky, angry, all those you know depressive signs and so in those negative phases he would have fights with the wife >> and so that discord was missed.
(15:26) So we treated the bipolarity in the male and then things calmed down. The fights subsided the husband wife became happy at the end and uh that was you know a happy story at the end. >> Yes. I'm glad but everyone feels sad. What is a big deal? I'm not too there's a in fact I feel it sometimes.
(15:49) What would you say the difference is between being sad and being depressed? So sadness it affects everyone and day. Now put depression it's a medical condition or a disorder >> where there have to be certain criteria met like for example the three main ones we look for are like sadness which is constant not like hey 1 minute I'm sad one minute no it has to be throughout the day or more uh hours of the day lasting few weeks or months then it has to be In a pan you get easily tired, fatigue ability then you lose interest in what you used to have before. For
(16:28) example, you used to go for a movie on a Sunday, meet your friends for a dinner. You start avoiding those things slowly slowly your uh personality is changing a little bit. You are avoidant and you're shunning yourself. >> Yes. >> So that criteria and there are other more 78 like that like sleep, concentration, work, self-care etc.
(16:49) So that criteria if you meet you can be diagnosed as having clinical depression be it stages borderline mild moderate severe now sadness again like think of it like blues it's an emotional status which it can be temporary be it with the stress be it with the your day not going well maybe your bossing you or maybe you wanted your favorite team to win in the IPL and you lost by one ball so those things also do affect you right so after a few hours or maybe one two days you get back to your routine. Your brain is
(17:22) trained in such a way that these chemicals this happy chemical the sad chemical. So these uh neurochemicals they fluctuate and then they come back to balance after a few hours or days. But in depression what happens that it stays like that. >> It doesn't normalize or doesn't revert to its normaly.
(17:41) So that's when you know you need help. But there's no way for it to subsidize on its own until it needs medical help. >> No, no, no. See, we our brain is so beautiful. The body is a wonderful, you know, uh, thing. You do your, you know, natural things like good sleep, good diet, meet people. Don't be alone. Avoid these substances like smoking, alcohol.
(18:02) Majorly 80% people might get better with this. Or else again do your exercise, read, start reading your books. We change your lifestyle. M >> you know that's what we say and if there's a stressor somewhere you identify it yourself and remove yourself from that place for example you have an alcohol problem but still you're meeting your friends at the local bar or local pub and having those drinks every day that's not a good sign so identify it remove yourself from that so avoid those friends meet new friends hey go play
(18:34) football play basketball or just go join a reading club the new circle so your pattern has to be changed So the naturally your brain adapts. So it needs at least 30 to 40 days uh studies say 40 to 45 days for any normaly or a habit to change. So do that primarily but still if it's not able and your body is in a bad state you're not sleeping well you're having these medical symptoms like headaches back pains you're crying a lot and the red flag here is very very negative thoughts for example selfharming behaviors or self u uh
(19:11) harming yourself to life or harming others >> the suicidal thoughts those are the things that are the red flags immediately you need to come to the doctor but if you want to try uh stage one try these lifestyle modifications for like at least 2 3 weeks then come visit the psychiatrist at the hospital or if you're not comfortable you can meet the psychologist or a counselor and at least get yourself assessed so then you'll have a root map what your current status is okay certain say a is like now uh then maybe two weeks tvata are you
(19:43) improving yes or not if you feel you're not improving and regressing then we are always available medications are the gold standard But uh you know if a person could be depressed they'll be very you know happy and all that put together. How do you actually recognize or you know so difficult? >> Good question.
(20:07) Uh some people are very good to hide their emotions. Maskingum they mask their emotions the sadness their anger very well. So and it is very sad. I mean we read it in the newspaper so often and not you know uh the su okay a student didn't do well in an exam suddenly they jumped up from a building or tried to commit self harm >> yes >> you know that person is a very cheerful person a kid for example but then small subtle signs >> maybe you can miss it and like I said you might say okay this is just a phase just leave it >> but the crying the anger the breaking
(20:47) stuff, the hitting, >> the avoiding locking yourself in your room. >> Yeah, >> these things one day, okay, two days fine. And if it is going for more than say a few days or weeks, that is a red flag. That is when you need to, you know, >> talk to your child. >> Yeah. >> Or anyone be it a friend who has gone through a bad breakup, uh a spouse who has lost a job >> or the most common things I see these days is the stock market.
(21:13) >> Okay. due to the whatever the wars the situation financial a lot of people have lost money invested like crores >> so that is a traumatic thing so that is a shocking thing so the red flags they can smile >> they can be cheerful because they're trying to pretend or they're genuinely trying to be normal like we want to you being uh like for example you're a mother you want to put a you know brave face for your children right you don't want to be crying in front of them and a lot of people there's nothing wrong in it. They cry
(21:45) behind closed doors or in the bathroom during showers. I say nothing wrong. Do it. But what I tell my you know uh friends, family or my patients is let your emotions out. Be it anger, be it crying, be it whatever. Let it out in your close group. If you're very embarrassed or that you know you your things are going to be spread like gossip, do it within you know this restricted best friends group or confidants.
(22:13) >> Yes. So that's when you release it and then the mask comes off >> and keeping the mask on for too long is also not correct. >> Very bad for the person going through things >> and it is not good for the health, the physical health, the mental health, the social health. Social health family >> and they will be still thinking yes it is all good.
(22:37) The reason I said family is because if something bad does happen, it is the family who feels the guilt the most and they start blaming themsel in turn. Oh, doctor. So that guilt feeling is again like a toxic web. It affects everyone in the house. >> Think like think of it like uh cancer. >> Yeah. >> One patient in the house has cancer. It's the whole household will be affected.
(23:04) Be it emotionally, financially, whatever, physically. Same thing with psychiatry. There's one psychiatry, a mental health issue. >> Yeah, >> let's use this word, the mental health issue. The whole family is affected. >> So that's why I say be open, talk it out, express your feelings. I think Jenzi kids are doing it a bit more. >> Yeah.
(23:25) >> Uh like I said, I think we had the conversation before as well. They're doing it a little bit more. So try to understand what is balance. Yes, you have an issue, don't overexemplify it. Don't exaggerate it. Stick to it and if it is normal, yes, if it is not, we are there to help you out. >> Since you brought up students, you know, a Telugu student particularly, their life is mapped and first, MSET, IIT, Chadali, Pel, uh, USL, Poly, Pel, it's all mapped.
(23:57) So what does this kind of mapping do to a teenager brain? >> Very good question Magna. Now to start it off I would say I'm also part of this factory. >> Okay. >> So even I I came out through the academyy's kakatya chaitanya and all. So we been through it. We know what happens inside out. It's hectic. It's grueling. You wake up in morning 7.
(24:19) You go to the coaching center 8. You are there till 5 6 then again study. Then again exams back to back because you're trained in a way like hey India is a very populous country as you know the list seats are again limited >> so for example one lakh seats there are almost like 10 lakhs 20 lakh students fighting for that >> even one coveted seat beat whatever engineering medical UPSC whatever so now you are trained from childhood race you you call it whatever be it a rat race beat whatever race it is you don't do well now there stages which I see 10th parents
(25:05) college life is sorted sorry we got it we go to the undergrad undergrad you need to have a good masters you get in a good IV league or something in national then your life is set so it the standards keep changing school it's over now but it's never over there is no finish line see education I feel is never ending >> you can keep studying till you're 50 till you're 80 whatever you're always trying to improve yourself in any field be it science AI medical law >> especially uh that way soap I feel it is getting more and more
(25:48) stressful because mur it was a little easier I don't know Why? But maybe it was again the the competition of the population but again for that time the seats were limited >> for this generation the seats are again increasing but for the population I think the ratio is matching but still it's not enough.
(26:08) So but the government is increasing more and more. Uh so it's again a debate is it good or is it bad. >> So you're tuning your brain either you get first or you're a nobody. Number one thing >> especially in Telugu household >> especially college top college not any B >> US have to be in the top colleges then again sadly there's a financial thing also you know financial constraints are there if seats are the are expensive their kas in it BCAT AAT ccat at lachalun so everything is competition and if you don't get well you are like not a good uh uh part of the family.
(26:54) >> You won't get a good girl or a good boy to >> and and it starts with actually siblings. Now miji it's very true but it's marriage when okay 25 but think of it at 16 >> the sibling rivalry starts look at your sister she's getting more marks than you know in waste life and then like I said again college 2025 US all these things are you know instilled again they're like the societal norms it is there and I think it is in a lot of cultures maybe it can be whatever north Indian, Gujarati, Marathi >> but South Indian uh people as far as I
(27:39) know are more stricter when it comes to studies compared to the other communities because I've seen few supportive parents who you know kids for example last month I had a kid goes to one of the top schools in Hyderabad Papa and the girl didn't do well >> now okay her brother studies in a very good college in the US, New York law.
(28:02) I don't know the name, Browns or something. So, she also aspires to go to some Ivy League, but she sadly is not having the grades or the GPA to do so. She might get into a good college. The father is ready to pay and all that. So, she's lucky she has good family support. So, in front of me, the father did a very beautiful gesture.
(28:23) She said, you know, beta, I don't care if you go to there. I'll send you to Dubai. I'll send you to Singapore, wherever you want to go. Don't have to beat yourself up so bad because we are not comparing you. And then the father was so surprised. We never had this discussion with our kids. >> Then you know one-on-one session.
(28:41) Then it came out that it was one of the aunts >> who put it in his head >> into the girl's head. Okay. >> Okay. Now you are like like okay you are like the future of a family. You're the next generation. uh you have see your brother's doing so well you know he's going to get a good rishta someone you also need to do that family name is going to come down man society all that which are totally not needed for a 15year-old girl per se so that is when she took it negatively and on herself and like I said guilt feelings
(29:15) is the you know red red flag because it goes in so many ways which you won't ever expect the girl you know may stop even having an interest in career. She might even avoid college. She might, you know, avoid her career, whatever studies because she's starting to blame herself that she's not good enough, that she's not worth it.
(29:36) >> But that's what we need to say. So when the dad said that in front of me, I was so, you know, pleasantly and genuinely happy. He didn't even care about anything. He was like, I don't care wherever you go. You tell me where. He like, put a map in front of you. Just put a finger and I'll send you to that country.
(29:54) So those small small beautiful you know family support moments you know that's what I feel is needed and again no not criticizing anyone uh everyone needs to study you know at the end education is the most important thing >> but the reason I said this is because in in that business community so he told me again even if my daughter doesn't do whatever she wanted to do interior and designing architecture uh I'll open a company for her >> and she can run the Because again it's in the blood, it's in the genes.
(30:24) >> So, so that's a plan B. So as a family member, as a parent, there's always plan A and always you need to have a plan B for your kids. >> Yes. So I feel parents need to do a lot in that area. I feel >> talking to the kids is number one. >> See sadly again that the girl didn't tell her father because she was scared.
(30:45) But then again the aunt planting that seed of negativity was again maybe right or wrong I won't say it was hers when when we asked the aunt we had a phone call with her because I didn't leave it I was like hindu so she was like it was my way of morally boosting her and at least pushing her because I felt she was getting a little bit lazy maybe she was maybe because she was like she was happy with her grades so the aunt was like I want to push her more >> her GPA I felt could do could have been better. So in her own way aunt was like
(31:20) boosting her morally but see the girl took it a very negative negative way. So you never know. You can never tell. Right. >> Right. And this happens with adults as well. The words may be misinterpreted. >> The especially with text. That's why I say if you want to talk something, you have a fight with your friend.
(31:43) Never text. >> Always have a phone call or leave a voice message which is it doesn't have to be 1 minute. Just leave a 20 second voice message. you know because sometimes that emotion becomes very very misinterpreted in texts. So even while explaining to kids that genuinely you know uh 15 years old 20 year olds even 20 I would say these uh this generation are emotionally a little bit lacking >> now I might get a little bit heat for this but see again the kids are growing so rapidly >> everything is social media the
(32:17) everything is impulsive. So some things we were trained okay we were scooled ated like fight 10 times or I remember you know a principal in a Catholic school would you know have a nice whack you know whack at us sometimes and it was okay uh because it was like >> we used to be naughty as well we were reprimanded in satisfaiming I will complain you to the police >> even parents for example this happens a lot in the US uh parents shout or even there's a small hint of uh no I'm going to ground you or I'm going to slap you
(32:54) 911. The kid calls the cops on the parents and this happens so so so uh frequently mna it is shocking at least in India it's not there but it is happening >> it might happen so >> it is already there >> okay they call police >> the 18 year olds the 20 year olds they are like I'm an adult now I'm going to call the cops you have no right to tell me so and so >> so it can be used as so many things for example don't go out at Don't roam on the roads. Come back home.
(33:28) 18 year olds and 19year-olds kids are like, "Who are you to tell me?" The dad is like, "It's my house, my rules, my bike. I paid for your bike or your car. I'm the one paying for your petrol. Don't do that. It's not safe. Don't drink and drive." The kids are like, "No, >> you can blame social media for it.
(33:45) " And and also another thing comparison siblings or friends or you know things like that but social media makes you want to compare your life with another person. I I think that's the worst thing for this uh generation in mental health aspect. What do you think? uh see Andy one uh comparison in the sense of learning something is for example an art there's a musician now there's a real how he's playing it and for some reason you want to take up the art or you are already a musician but you're not up there you're not the best but you try to
(34:24) imitate or copy something and that's a good positive thing you're trying to imitate and learn something >> but then if for example you want see something and start having negative emotions towards it. You want to have this guy is nothing. We do we didn't waste he's not even that good-looking. How is he getting thousand likes? That negative emotions that hatred that I feel is the wrong thing.
(34:52) So when you have something appreciate the other person and take the good things from it incorporate some things as well. Mhm. >> But now uh for example whatever social media is good or bad it is again changing so fast now we had uh 1 minute shorts then it became 30 secondond res then next I don't know it might be a 10-second reel we don't know what's happening the dopamine it is so fast the pat the person has no idea how to analyze one reel before he completes analyzing understands and accept accepts one re there's already
(35:30) three four reels that have been swiped up. >> Yes. >> So there is nothing that positive is going on with the swiping >> and in our generation we used to have newspapers and magazines. I still feel that is the best way to go. You're calm, you're sorted and in the present moment we call that mindfulness. >> There's a page, there's an article, read it, understand it, grasp it.
(35:54) >> With the reals, there's nothing that is being grasped. like maybe oh the clothes that the person wore that makeup or the shoes oh that's like a one lakh watch oh that's a Rolex all that comparison so that's when you said comparison is dangerous I also feel it is true because recently I uh even obviously we all scroll social media I was just scrolling through I was looking for say a watch >> my I for some reason the algorithm was caught all of my next feeds were the most expensive watches in the world I get one watch Amani is wearing one Tom
(36:30) Cruz is wearing and these watches are what like 10 lakhs I one watch is 1 cr apparently so that's when you start >> you know comparison you wear say 10,000 watch is good enough for you for your status for your a class 10 student you don't need a Rolex >> come on you might be uh like 40 having your own company business a huge doctor yeah buy it from your own money that's beautiful but Now the goals is be becoming so materialistic I feel our goal is like to set a small clinic a small firm or a small business shop then
(37:10) let's grow it to say a building let's expand no it's all materialistic let's buy a Ferrari first forget Mercedes it's directly Ferrari and then the kids are also being trained in such a way like it's a lot of fake things that go on on Instagram as you Magna >> whatever an influencer shows it's not even his or hers it might be rented or just marketing branded for someone but the lifestyle is shown in a way cha life I'm in one day Goa I'm in one day in Sri Lanka one day in Bali >> and that's not normal no one does that
(37:46) unless they're travel enthusiasts or like you know celebrities or what so the kids these days I see a lot they're getting influenced by the lifestyle The demands that they want is becoming crazy. They're not asking Nokia or small phones iPhone. They're not asking the iPad, the normal tablet, iPad Pro. >> Like the Max.
(38:11) >> Yes. Yes. >> That attaching Max for everything. I want a phone Max. I want an iPad Max. I want a TV Max. So there is no normalization or standardization I feel where your age is this. this is all you're going to get. This is the best that we can give you. I might be a millionaire. I might be a daily wage worker but still while status whatever they can afford is what you can give.
(38:37) But the kids are expressing so much and then if they're not that is becoming an issue where we see as uh behavioral abnormalities or t temper tantrums. They're going uh berserk. They're breaking objects in the uh house. They're like threatening. eight an 8-year-old girl took a butter knife and put it through her throat recently and said >> yeah a case of mine recently and she said to the father for her birthday so that again is such a different tangent maybe the daughter was pampered maybe whatever it's fine but the limits
(39:17) are being crossed because she yeah she threw a party in that lavish hotel a fivestar hotel naka hotel in agawali along with that gift >> okay >> and if you don't do I'll do this and that's where we are seeing a lot of problems it used to be teenagers maybe but now sadly the age is coming down young kids such as 8 9 10 are having these behaviors and it's not normal this is not what 8-year-old or 10 yearear-old should do >> oh my god but uh another thing about social media suppose Uh now example like suppose um there's a real that says
(39:58) uh five aspects he's a narcissist like you're your husband is narcissist so algorithm picks it up and then five reels it's the same thing and now now I'm sitting oh my god I'm married to a narcissistic [snorts] person >> what am I supposed to do you know it builds up so even if it's not true just because of social media I'm starting to think all these mental health specialists Yes.
(40:24) So they're not very healthy. What do you think about these? >> See, uh, educational videos are good. >> I mean, we also do that and we also learned from a lot of our seniors and peers who used to do educational videos. But nowadays it has become like a fad. >> Uh, in a bad way I feel. For example, uh, take maybe a dermatologist.
(40:47) Okay, your skin is oily. Use this this this cream. Use this soap. They're just putting it out there. >> You have hair loss, use this shampoo. So, it's again medically okay, accepted or not is again a different legal issue. But education promotion is what I feel. >> Okay. >> And in this like you said, five features. It's not true.
(41:10) >> I cannot do a test in 5 seconds. It's impossible. And this is again for the hook to drag you in for the viewership. And yes there are so many tests that we do in our clinic. The psychologist does the psychiatrist does. These are like like proper uh you know clinical rating scales which have been thoroughly researched over the years and then they are put out in the world where we can use them.
(41:38) So without standardization and all these tools we cannot just say okay if I you are this if two you are this. No we use certain guidelines certain tests and assessments which are you know which have to be done by a professional >> not on social media by five things assess yourself and no but yeah it's like saying hey we do chronic pathological liar.
(42:01) >> I cannot brand a person. Yes. There's a term called pathological chronic. >> I lost because I did think of it. >> Yeah. And then narcissistic trait, domination trait, um or patriarchal, matriarchal. So it's not that easy. So they are uh guidelines. Get the person to us. We'll do the testing for you if you have those doubts.
(42:24) But then again, personality traits again it's not rocket science. >> You can assess in a person. If it is, everyone has traits. Even I might have certain narcissistic traits. Who doesn't? Every person will have certain good traits, certain bad traits. Now they're getting out of control in your daily life, your professional life, your family life.
(42:44) >> That is when you say, "Hey, you have a medical problem. You need to go to a doctor." But like I said, uh common things see the things are happening between boyfriend and girlfriends. the reals are there, the Google is there, the chat GBT is there, and then the girlfriend or the boyfriend coming up and saying, "Hey, I feel you're having this. I think we need to break up.
(43:04) " >> But like I said, that is not good. That's not legal. That's not even uh right. >> A medical licensed uh professional should be doing it, not Google or Chad, >> just influencers. >> Yeah. But again for fun if you take it as like a good in a sense of humor you're just doing it for fun that's okay you get some kick out of it a laugh but don't take it too seriously my goto home you know takeaway messages any real given by a non-medical professional please take it lightly don't take it to heart just have a good laugh at it and
(43:39) forget it >> I want to come back to parents you know parents But we are normal. We turned out good only make it a big deal. I know conversation I'm sure most kids would have had with their parents. So what do you think about this? >> I have it every day [laughter] with my parents.
(44:05) So again like I said generation wise they were stronger >> physically mentally uh even the like for example they used to we know work it out in the fields they used to be naturally you know suscepted to the diseases and immunity again just one example the hardships that they did for example they used to walk >> take a bus or cycle all that.
(44:34) So slowly slowly the lifestyle is changing. >> Now coming fast forward to 2026 we have Tesla self-driving cars. So forget even using your hands. So it takes an impact on the way we look at things the hardships psychologically, physically, mentally I feel. So the resilience I do agree older generations had it much better physically, mentally and a stress they would take it and yes maybe they would suffer keep it inside not go because psychiatrist especially in India psychiatry has been booming since I would say 20 maybe 2007 and 8 boom start now 15 especially area
(45:15) co era uh the referrals to psychiatry has increased but like I they talk to themselves among the relatives and again if it is kids and this I do still hear when the kids wants to go to the therapy. Yeah. >> So like I said one therapy a lot of parents 90% per se I think will be okay because they think but the moment we say okay maybe there is something there we need to go dig deeper because it's not like a blood test it's not like that we need to dig deep and deep so it takes at least four five sessions. So when we say mother father
(46:01) you know three four sessions for us to get a clearer picture then they start Blame the child. You're not emotionally strong. Again, the same thing which I told you. I used to walk 10 kilometers to the school. I used to go to the well, pick up water to shower. All those unnecessary comparisons are brought in to a topic which is not needed.
(46:35) Now the topic might be I'm getting bullied at school. >> That's such a different tangent. That's like not even related to my father walking 10 kilometers. It's not related. But the parents you know do that. So what we try to teach the parents is first understand the core concept then sorry if [clears throat] your child is not willing to go in a bus is not willing to walk or do the physical exercise then you can bring in p me example.
(47:01) Yeah >> you used to walk for you know 5 km to school or two shanki. So that is a good example but without having a clear knowledge of what it is just bring it in Jan and Jna good for you but it doesn't match the story but it is India we are going to be like that maybe in the future I might also tell my kids the same thing in 2022 26 >> I might because that's how we are it's our human pattern it's our wiring that I would say >> but parents unresolved trauma sometimes especially mothers do you think that passes on to the children like mental
(47:43) health issues >> like genetic bias >> a lot of things have genetic bias as well even in psychiatry be for example OCD >> anxiety stress a lot of females especially >> anxiety >> yeah so anxious personality disorder it has a genetic bias genetic basis especially Most statistics show like the women you know in the childhood again they had it it becomes a personality okay >> or then OCD it's lifelong it can be you know the intensity might be brought down >> over the years because you train your habits or your body and your mind but if
(48:23) it is not treated it becomes a chronic thing and your children might see you behave that way >> for example OCD uh okay there's dust here you keep on cleaning saying it over and over and you wash your hand times like after eating a meal. Now you being a kid who five years or sixes what would you think >> that is normal? You don't know that is abnormal needles naggles because we know now but at the age of five six you don't think that's and you try to mimic hey my mom watches her aunts I think that is correct >> then certain things okay when the other
(48:58) people in the household say okay you as a child shouldn't be doing that many times you ask why >> now the parents don't know how to explain the why >> now if they knew how to explain the why it would be so much easier for the child to understand they'll be like a punishment then that fear sets in. They don't know why the mother is doing it.
(49:19) They think it is normal but they are not allowed to do it. >> Okay. >> So if there's a genetic thing for example everyone has some carriers genetic preloading and genetic carriers like everyone might have a cancer gene. >> Yeah. So not everything is activated but under certain you know situations or environments or stressors it it is triggered and it activates or it is exemplified.
(49:45) >> Okay. So now even in this condition chin punch now the daughter is in a teenagers the parent the mother didn't change she's not getting help still few traits might aggravate or get triggered maybe the anxious thing might start getting triggered she starts getting fearful she gets worried and the OCD thing starts in many different ways the daughters try to hide their anxiety or cope up with it by over cleaning their room >> okay So the patterns increase to cover the anxiety.
(50:19) >> Okay. >> Why is my mother doing it? What's wrong with my mother? So 14 15 these things you know come out. Then the pattern is seen. >> Okay. The mother is there, the daughter is there. Then the family members start thinking the genetica. >> Okay. >> Like I [snorts] said it can be genetic but a lot of these behaviors are brought on by the like what you call the society or the environment.
(50:41) >> Okay. Okay. >> Environmental factors are very important. They pick it up. >> They pick it up very early as young as 3, four. You clean, you clean a certain way. I can guarantee you your four-year-old child will mimic it in the certain way. For example, there's a swab, there's a circle motion, then the square motion, everything will be copied by the child in that fashion.
(51:04) >> So that way, >> yeah. So since we're talking about women particularly, but like mental health issues, it goes on and on. uh it could be teenagers, PMS, you know, PMOS now. >> Yes. >> And uh also postpartum pregnancy, so many things. So how would you talk about women's mental health particularly >> women's mental health is very very important.
(51:32) I would say sadly a lot of people don't understand that and like you said so this I get a lot from my female clients as well because they might be having severe disturbances during the PMS cycle or they might be you know the ovelation cycle or everything whatever menstruation is very difficult for them >> the mothers also >> but sadly that's what I feel everyone in the household needs to be educated even the males >> because they don't know what's going on when it's a gyneic issue they try to sh you know run away >> or don't even want to know about it they
(52:11) say okay to the wife >> or her whatever the females in the house take care of this issue >> now mental health in the women it encompasses so many things >> be it from small small things such as anxiety marital stress >> college stress school it's starting as young as 14 12 14 >> then marriage then you know financial then job they have to balance so many things and in that managing the body is also something that they need to take care of >> age wise there's so many things >> women may have diabetes as early as 20s
(52:47) and 30s these days cholesterol is increasing weight gain hair loss acne you know with stress there's so many things that people don't know >> stress and lack of proper sleep for a women can affect the skin color, the quality, the hair fall, hair density, then the acne. So this is just again what I'm saying the hormonal >> a lot of people think it is purely hormonal but they forget it is stress it is lifestyle again other things as well they might be smoking alcohol so many other things >> then uh >> proper sleep hygiene
(53:22) >> have all these things lifestyle wise then these things will also help you >> medication is not the only thing medication along with you know lifestyle modifications self-help techniques help so many things >> and the other thing we need to help out in the women thing is they're not brought to the hospital soon.
(53:40) >> Yeah. >> They brought in the last last stages the males come faster. >> Okay. >> At least this Yeah. If the male has stomach issue is what you call I'm having a beer or a glass of whiskey every day. Very good. Go. Women they have this for months and months till they don't show up to the hospital. Either it be like ignorance, lack of education and then again people in the house also double blood test scanning minimum local shop is what they give is again whatever they say pain gas tablet that's
(54:26) it >> so the underlining thing is pushed and pushed to a stage where it is so so serious last came on for example there's a uterus issue or a fibroid or something we have to do a surgery. >> So if it was identified before it would have treated been treated in a very easier way, very minimalistic financial way without being a burden emotionally also.
(54:49) Now the mother or the person has to go through it so much. >> So this is just one example. Now coming to medical example imagine psychiatric >> psychiatry is pushed first push pushed till it becomes so bad >> and they are unable to handle that person in the home >> it is when and I'm not even kidding me last two three months a lot of cases were bought by the children >> and I'm like why didn't the husband come why did your brother come no they didn't want to come >> the this is mostly again if you see those SCS and soio economic status and mostly from the lower middle class at LA
(55:32) this is the thing the kids are fighting with the father and bringing the mother to the psychiatrist or the hospital for a general checkup forget psychiatric first a general checkup psychiatric I think about the fight so after the kids fight because these genz kids are now psychoeducated or they know okay psychiatry just mandul zombie chamom there's actual medical facts that we do you know that it is helping >> so the kids are bringing and I feel so so good >> but that you know the children are becoming more proactive in the family
(56:06) small signs we are you know we the children are catching me video five signs you might be having this in a good way it is helping these kids to at least identify hey my mother be might be having you know some problem >> she might be depressed She might be having insomnia, sleep disorder, something. So let's get her checked.
(56:27) So that is one thing is improving. But yes, the women's mental health needs a lot lot more. I feel the government also needs to step up. The awareness campaigns needs to be stepped up. Private uh hospitals can do much better job. The government I think hand in hand and again social media, news media. >> Yes.
(56:51) M so that way you know that is the goal to go into the deeper deeper parts the tribals the villages and tell them look this is this disorder at least the basic one like how you say chest pain go to a cardiologist get your ECG done something like that the small small thing small flyers need to be put out saying these things our mental health or neuros >> but more than that I think the men they need to be uh educated on this because most of the time like female if she's screaming or if she's you know angry it is flagged like okay she's hormonal PMS periods
(57:40) it's not always like that right so I think men need to be more educated on this >> definitely see that's why now coming into this generation. I feel it needs to start at a school level. >> Yeah. >> You know, we used to have school of uh if you remember social sciences, civic science, economics, then we used to have a moral science class.
(58:02) So, moral science class, they used to teach about these things. Okay. If you have a fight, how would how you should respond? court voted on Gaza you know deescalate the situation find out what happened and then report it to the teachers or principal. So moral science class taught us that now coming to this science class there needs to be something you know more about you know uh explaining the kids at a young age what is happening with the biology.
(58:32) It doesn't have to be just fever, cold, cough explain. There needs to be women classes for the at least you know kids who are at 12 13 age getting the periods for the first time [snorts] how to handle that cycles. It's not easy for them. They don't know what it is. They don't know how to wash up or maintain their hygiene.
(58:52) So hygiene needs to be taught. They need to be taught it's nothing wrong. So these things mental health they can maybe you know start few sections saying we don't have to go all out we can just be like if your mother is crying >> or if your father is crying continuously he's drinking a lot tell your teachers tell your relatives at where someone a third party can help out or identify the issue and give the proper treatment.
(59:18) So it can be the basic things or it can be like you know anger issues, physical abuse. Number one thing that I would say I've seen a lot is even molestation these days. >> So those things needs to be taught. Good touch, bad touch. >> You know it's done by family members >> statistic wise and even in my hospital I've seen lot of the girl childs are molested very sadly by their own family relatives, the uncles, the mamas, the chichas.
(59:50) So and that goes so so so you know unexposed. >> We need to explain the kids what it is. >> When now I had a case recently uh she's 22 23 now. >> Now papam she's having traumatic dreams >> and this happened when she was 8 and 10 years old apparently >> living in her hometown where the uncle used to live in the above house. So every day he used to come down sleeping paraka he used to do these illicit activities and the girl didn't know about it.
(1:00:23) This went on for few months she didn't know and then when she got older she knew what it was and it became a stage where she couldn't even tell anyone >> father chip the mother chip. >> So now she's 22 23 now she's having nightmares and traumatic flashes of her childhood for certain reasons. Uh it uh it was so random that she saw a movie or a TV show on >> Yeah.
(1:00:46) >> Netflix and Atlantic seen her chin in that >> and that triggered her >> in a very bad way. So anxiety started you know negative thoughts blaming herself self harm she started punching the walls >> because of this she couldn't sleep. Then she came to us now we're doing the therapy. >> Now she has accepted it.
(1:01:07) We made it a point now >> so that she was brave enough. She went and told her mother >> and her father this. >> Yeah. >> This happened like you know so many years ago. Surprising you know what the father said. The mother was shocked but she accepted. The father is still denying. God >> the father is still like and the audacity he said you dreamt about it in your dreams.
(1:01:33) >> My god >> because you are eight. What do you know? And the father still doesn't agree for it. But whatever the bra, you know, the brave thing is the girl stood, you know, took a stance. She went and faced them >> uh the person who did it and the family because of you and then now she's little bit better, more confident.
(1:02:00) But yeah, these are the sad things that go on a lot. So that's why I'm saying right mental health starts from the home. >> Yeah. >> Women's mental health starts from schooling and it has to be very very young age. >> But you know parents if a young girl is going through something she'll be fine. But what will happen to her marriage if she gets into it in this situation? >> It's a very tricky situation.
(1:02:29) See uh marriage is in a way good >> uh sometimes it does good things companionship that uh the confidence that someone is there to you know have your back and all but if there's a serious issue with the person be it whoever the girl or the boy I would say solve it first >> then get into a marriage you don't want to carry that baggage into the relationship beat whatever Now again I would like to advocate the lot of like now this coming back to your previous question psychiatry under taboo they don't want to come to the doctor
(1:03:09) why because of when they're 15 16 or 22 they get labeled and then they hide it >> yes the treatment might be still going on be it for example the boys bipolar or schizophrenic he's treated remission zero symptoms He's like near perfect in his family life, his daily life and office. They know for sure schizophrenia by plant is a huge huge it's a black dot but he's fine.
(1:03:44) So they try to say he's they cover it up basically. Then after some time the wife will obviously every day 24 hours low at least once you will notice some change. >> Yeah. He might have one bad day where he might act very differently or he's taking certain pills. He's going to say, "I'm taking vitamins. I'm taking my, you know, supplements or neuromds.
(1:04:04) " At some point, the wife is going to start questioning and doubt and then she's going to catch that tablet sheet and be like, "Hey, what is this? I'm going to Google it. Oh, it's lithium. Oh, it's for bipolar. Oh, psychiatry." Everything is gone. Everything is like it's a war zoning. very very bad scenes out there and this is very common.
(1:04:25) So now and coming to this if it's mentally like a psychiatric patient or be it anything it can be autoimmune disorder it can be a obesity case or a cancer patient whatever hiding is not good but now again marriage again is not the solution. So coming back to you marriage. Now what are the situations we see there? It can be number one the guy the girl is little bit a free bird.
(1:04:55) >> She likes to argue with her father. She gets her way like a tomboy. So what we say the guy will take care of you. Second, uh there might be okay relationship that the girl has already been in which the family is not okay with be intercast or a love marriage. Then they break it up and then this falls into place before someone else gets to know about it and your options for future matches are gone.
(1:05:26) Or third, it is in the culture. A lot of communities have where the girl is married at the age of 18 19 the you know the education is stopped their career is stopped the job is stopped and it becomes a housewife role or a homemaker so again the internal but coming to is it right or wrong it's a personal thing it's a communal thing community and societal thing but yeah what I would say is be it a marriage at 18 be it a marriage at 25 hell you can marry at 50 that's your wish but the maturity needs to be there the emotional maturity are you mature enough to marry
(1:06:05) because now I have a few cases they're both first relationship they didn't have any previous boyfriend or girlfriend or a dating thing now they put into a marriage arranged now they're fighting for everything they don't know how to handle the other person's emotions first of all emotion handle they're expecting or expected to handle the other person's as well.
(1:06:29) >> Yes. >> So that is not going to happen. So that's why you need to be mature enough, emotionally mature to handle your own emotions first. And when you're ready for marriage, you'll know. >> And if you're ready, go for it. It's a very beautiful thing. Yes, it is like a roller coaster.
(1:06:47) It'll have its ups and downs, but unless you're ready. If you have a baggage, if you have certain things in your life which uh are not going to be solved immediately, deal with them first. Tawata go into the marriage because unnecessarily you don't want the other person to know later. Tarvata being in India, it's going to be a family family drama.
(1:07:10) It's going to be a mahabharat and then everyone's going to come to the psychiatrist uh family package or whatever. But then it becomes really tough to deal with it. But then again, marriage is good. Being pressurized is not good. >> Yes, >> that's what I would feel. >> I want to talk about the epidemic most countries are labeling as one loneliness.
(1:07:33) We are supposed to be the most connected uh generation and they we could be surrounded by so many friends and yet feel alone. So what do you think about that? >> It is very true. I mean loneliness is it's it's been there since generations and centuries. It's nothing new but coming from this generational aspect it is definitely on the rise based on the data and the statistics that we have now we are what we call this is a hyperconnected world be it the social media the digital and the physical it's hyperconnected and in that sense what is
(1:08:10) happening is due to certain things loneliness anxiety depression is increasing >> now it can be multifaceted think reasons. It's not just one. We cannot just blame uh digital media and all. Yes. Go to the school, go to the walk, talk to people, social activities, social living was there, play in a group sport, play, you know, go to the movies together, go to the hotels and restaurants and even pubs together.
(1:08:39) But now everything you do it solo. You watch on a TV, on a phone, it's solo. You can't have an iPhone and have 10 people watch it together. It's not possible. Now games, everyone's onto the playing video games. Again, that is one thing. Uh again, community events are decreasing. Then coming back to the other previous question, comparison, >> yeah, >> confidence is coming down.
(1:09:06) They want to be happening wearing Gucci, Armani, whatever. They don't have it. They don't want to go to that party. So now if you have that for example Gucci bag then only I want to go to that party. That's how you're fixing your mind because certain X Y Z people are going to be there from that social status.
(1:09:26) I don't want to be compared. I don't want to be small. >> That is also one thing. So avoidance behavior is happening a lot I feel. And then coming back to the spectrum they think they're happy alone but no one is going to be happy alone. I feel you. It's an it's a mirage. It's a facade. It's a temporary thing. So I would say being loneliness being happy it's good for certain days but on the long run it's never good and loneliness happiness is good or I am happy being lonely.
(1:09:58) It's a false statement. Never believe anyone who says that I feel. >> But what about these parents particular parents cities or they left here alone. So that is another level of loneliness I feel. Very good question Magna the thing again Indian society we were always a joint society joint families now it's all nuclear nuclear no one is playing staying in the same place for long it's like jumping you are in Bangalore then next month you're in Hyderabad next month Delhi next one different country so state a state I mean like a physical state
(1:10:34) you'll have that consistency a good group of people lifestyle like habits rhythm or like same thing activities you do in a way which keeps you grounded. >> Yes. >> Now such speed things such hyperconnected things nothing is going to keep you grounded. >> So it is working for the current generation. Okay.
(1:10:56) You're that hyper you're that uh what do you call hip and happening very good but the older generations it's not going to be happening even with age. Now yes parents are going to be left alone. If you have the financial backing, if you have the capacity, yes, you can keep them in your home. Uh hire a caretaker or nanny and you know they're with you >> taking care in your house and you can do your thing.
(1:11:21) Go to your office morning, take care of own kids. But if that's not feasible, grandparents or sorry the parents or the grandparents are you know voluntarily choosing to go back to the native places >> now it is good also I feel. All friends circle that sense of togetherness or safety is always there. City low grand aged person I would say grandparents or no person about 60 70 said I am happy or I feel safe.
(1:11:51) No one especially in the high-rise apartments it is good kam in the country at least evening every day 6:00 they come down they walk or they have that gatherings but nothing is the same as their hometowns now sadly in this world in this lifestyle generation it's not going to happen but if you are financially able to definitely hire a caretaker or a medical nurse and the parents can be there and just once in a go do visit them as much as possible.
(1:12:22) Send your cricket kids your you know so that they have that grand grandparents grandchild union as well and uh see how it works. I'm not saying this will work for everyone. Do what works for you. Try it. But leaving parents alone not taking care of them sadly again salary reasons we cannot blame anyone. It can be so many reasons.
(1:12:46) Uh so I work with the gediatric uh rehab as well in kukat paliki atula and duro where it's a home senior living assisted living so we have apartment style each uh person has its own room male female couples go to naru >> husband wife they have a couple room two beds side by side and we as doctors we provide nursing home like the caretakers and we are providing 24/7 okay >> and then the same thing uh Morning we do some exercises physiootherapy.
(1:13:17) Evening they come sit in the venda parking lot and then they have the games and sports. So I felt that is a very good uh you know initiative that the company has taken. Uh it's an Chennai based company. >> Okay. >> And they did a fantastic job the hygiene the medical care. Uh I recently joined the organization because I was tied up with a few others.
(1:13:41) Uh sadly for whatever reasons again. So you offer mental health to them? >> Yes, we offer all. It's like assisted living. There are medical sugar BP patients who are paralysis patients, neuro patients, mental health patients would like old age again there's dementia cases which are there Alzheimer's dementia. So that is majorly seen in old age.
(1:14:04) So they are so uh affected mentally they don't even remember the kids faces anymore. They don't even know how to brush their own teeth. Those are severe cases. We have two or three of those. So for them we have assisted packages where you know nurse 24/7 then the nurse takes care of the patient and kids could they're coming every weekends they come spend 2 three hours with them.
(1:14:27) It's like a mini community. So I think that is something initiative if we take like we can do it our own community. We don't even have to start a company for it. society neighborhood law if you have neighbors Saturday we can be like let's all sit together for 1 hour >> get the old people out >> okay >> it can be randomly assigned to whoever has the biggest house in the neighborhood who has a garden just put a chairs carum boards should start ji just to start ji play even you know or some cards that is good cognitive exercise good community bonding and that's like a
(1:15:04) social responsibility that we can Yes, >> as citizens. >> So I believe that is something that we can do if you don't have the time just with your neighbors start once a week >> and you know that'll be like a get together also a small kitty party for the seniors. >> I know we spoke about everyone parents women but we missed [snorts] out on the larger uh part of our audience which are men.
(1:15:30) >> We never talk about men's mental health. So how do you address that? >> So the beauty with meni they are coming out more nowadays. In my own practice I've been practicing for like 13 14 years. It was very hard to convince a man saying okay n problem he knows okay let's just take uh financial issues he starts drinking now he has depression stress and alcohol addiction see you have this boss come on let's start somewhere he does not agree to it that he has a problem
(1:16:14) >> denial was number one issue unless his liver got damaged his kidneys got damaged sugar spike he's forcefully admitted in the ICU is when the change would be brought on >> or uh family members would forcefully bring the person and admit in a deaddiction center or a rehab but now people are especially men or voluntarily and that is very beautiful to see it might be a very small problem it might be a huge problem they are coming forward and saying I feel something wrong, I want to get it checked.
(1:16:52) >> Okay. >> And please tell me if there's something wrong with me. >> And that is how we start. And that is >> the men or younger. >> Uh it is all age groups. >> Okay. >> The gentleman who came last like this on his own without his wife's knowledge was 60 plus. >> Yeah. because of his stress he was having BP fluctuations and all title on Instagram not mine someone else's but linking mental health and uh blood pressure he said I didn't even go to my cardiologist doctor I came directly to a psychiatrist which was very good so Idi
(1:17:30) and but again it is very true and men don't cry that often men hide their emotions because they are the foundation for the family they are the uh the element of the face. So they have to put put up this brave front, confident front and again they're human at the end. Some people are yes stronger, more emotionally resilient and uh easy to not easy sorry very hard to break.
(1:17:58) Some people are you know weak emotionally less confident. They're very anxious easy to emotional uh you know distress. They can't handle pressure that easily. they break easily. There's nothing wrong in it. uh the mal you know the statement is oh I'm not man enough in moonic again I would say that is you know garbage to be honest every person is different every male female everyone is different so all have the pros all are the cons now coming to openness the fear is there >> number one fear doctor >> so that is where now we are openly
(1:18:38) saying that is not how we proceed yes we do the testing we do the medical labs we do the psychological labs we do the counseling yes when the medication is needed open you can also discuss with your doctor which tablets you want to use which you don't want to use then we try to you know make a system where you are happy I'm happy middle ground and definitely 1 month 2 months try cheddar low in tapu >> see people are afraid to use psychiatric medications my question to everyone out there is why are you not afraid of using
(1:19:10) the BP medications. Why are you not afraid about using audu? Everyone is on the injections. Ompic everyone has side effects >> or take a do almost every day. >> Exactly. There every tablet has a side effect. You Google it up. >> Yeah. >> Now ompic had so many side effects. Where did that go? Where did the fear go? Everyone ran to the hospital saying I want the shots.
(1:19:34) And trust me, there was a shortage. At one point in Hyderabad there was a shortage of vigori oric because so many people took it off label without the prescriptions without the doctor's authorization as well. Now yes every injection every medication has its pros and cons. Now we are the experts. We being MBBS and MD and DMs we know when to stop the medication.
(1:20:01) If the patient is really in distress or side effects are very bad, we stop and then we alter, we change. No tablet is perfect. So the same way uh we uh started off with our older medications but now the research in neuro and psychiatric and neuroscychiatric field is going so fast europlow new new tablets are coming out without the side effect profiles of before. Yes.
(1:20:27) >> Now, yes, we do still use medications which were invented in 1970s, which were found in 1980s, uh, and they still work good, but again, they might not suit you. >> They might suit someone, but we need to do the trial for that. But now, a lot of people are preferring the new ones like the second genum, third generation medications which were recently found 2010.
(1:20:50) >> Yes. >> Post 2020, 2020. So those drugs are having more less side effects. But then again, everyone has its own favorite. I might like biryani from say one hotel, you might like it from another hotel. So it's personal preference also at the end. But uh as a normal person to a doctor you know about these drugs the medical u you know I mean mental health psychiatric pills or um too like you'll get addicted you'll act like a zombie so much goes online and people talk about it but how far is it true everyone so scared of these I like how
(1:21:31) you brought it up >> what do you think like why are people so scared about it >> because number one I feel it was portrayed in the oldest cinemas, oral media, print media and it was it is true. I mean the way the severe like I said the ignorance, lack of awareness severe condition and then we had to do severe treatments for it.
(1:21:58) For example, there's a cardiac patient who had a stroke emergency. We do stenting and all all those cardiac interventional procedures. Why do you do it? We do it because it is needed. Yes. And there are high-end procedures. It's not like a small uh open things are not open bypass surgeries are not a small thing. It's lifethreatening also.
(1:22:17) But we do it because we need it. So rao psychiatric patients dr and in that terminal condition we had to do very you know very dangerous techniques or very uh interventional techniques also for example ect >> which is shock therapy. simple words slow law shock treatment electroconvental therapy and and then it used to be in the US law and all the European countries have even more severe uh things where they had to lobotomy and lobotization.
(1:22:49) So they used to take a small needle and a hammer and you know through the nose and go into the brain and pick one point where the emotional center and the frontal lobe at they tap it and the needle goes and that damages that uh you know neuronal center in the brain just the patients used to be zombies.
(1:23:07) It's like almost destroying a part of the brain. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> And the brain stops functioning and then high doses would the older drugs severe drugs powerful ones you had to sedate him. You had to make him a zombie for say per there's a good case studies if ever you have time please visit Google there long long stories from 1950s and '7s asylums US law mental asylums very fascinating intriguing stories so for example there's a serial murderer who had murder at least murdered 20 30 people now how would you treat such a person or control such a person So he
(1:23:45) had to be put on very very high doses and they had to zombify him because of worry where he would kill a guard. >> Okay. >> Okay. Female nurse neck snap just and these people Americans as you know Caucasians or be the African-Americans they're huge. The height the built the body physical structure is very different from us Indians.
(1:24:08) So they can you know break a neck a in a second laga. So out of fear or out of necessity we had to do it and then became media. The movies the Alfred Hitchcock uh the black and white cinemas the murder dramas are the people started you know imagining psychiatry only as limited to that. Okay >> only pul treat just and again picholu is such a very vague word.
(1:24:32) >> See you can have anxiety we treat it. You can have insomnia we treat it. That doesn't mean you're mentally ill. You know those are behavioral or like physiological things that the brain is going through. So coming to this over the period of time again awareness and all happened in the US >> FDA approval under the FDA is again food drug administration which author like gives a green signal this is safe you can use it.
(1:24:59) >> Yeahanti drug >> it's not like we use some you know magical treatments from the pharmacy company. No, we use all standardized uh good you know good imported products or domestically made like you know there's so many Sunfarma uh big famous brands Atlante so now the image has changed now movies there's so many movies Shah Rukh Khan did a movie where is a psychiatrist >> uh so tears in the key >> yeah so I there's so many nice size movies where you portray the psychiatrist not as a villain giving shock only or even Now injection do you
(1:25:39) see they poke it in the needle press person fails. So all these things you know are you know don't happen that easily these days. So the image is changing the fantasy is changing. We are no longer the the devils or the danger doctors. We are also you know pleasant people. We are also good soft people. So awareness again, news media, uh, social media, digital media, everything is having an impact positively.
(1:26:08) Everything will have a negative impact as well. But now I see openly I can say positivity overwways or overshadows the negatives and that is good for the for everyone in fact >> but you uh specialize in something called as TMS if I'm not wrong which most of us haven't heard of. So now how I started with uh there were a lot of techniques like oldite ect then came many many interventional techniques because they were experimenting in a whole lot of way lobotomy on day there were other techniques also with giving high infused
(1:26:41) sedation low they try to mimic changes in the brain. So now these techniques what are happening in the research wise new is called neuromodulation. >> Okay. >> So neuromodulation techniques now we have ketamin therapy. Ketamin is again a drug, anesthesia drug uh that is used for anxiety and uh depression.
(1:27:03) So again it's feared by a lot of patients because they Google anesthesia oh anesthesia drug will I die or will I take it? I will not wake up from that sleep. Uh so these things are there but these are research to calm down the brain or bring the chemical changes into your brain. We are forcing them with these chemicals and trying to stabilize or normalize.
(1:27:24) So shock therapy is electrical current which goes to the brain and you know we try to stabilize the chemicals and it is beautiful. ECT is very safe. We give it again with anesthesia. Older times they used to give it directly and directly they used to hold down the patient put a rubber thing so that tongue is not bitten and directly temple or scalp mida two electrodes and then past current.
(1:27:52) It was again Starting low very high voltage patient would be brain fried or all that but this again 1900s world war time slow then the technology or research increase now we know the current in the exact point we know how to give the dosing of the current and it's very safe >> it's beautifully used in patients with severe suicidal ideation aggression pathological self harm patterns to themsel or others severe aggression bipolar So instantly patient cool down that is a very beautiful technique.
(1:28:26) >> Okay. >> Now with research we have come to RTMS or TMS which is again transcranial magnetic stimulation. >> Okay. So the same thing electrodes certain electricity these waves resonating magnetic waves or something to it's like a helmet the other things are like electrodes where we place on the brain the technician or the doctor or the you know neuroscientist does it and it's like a 15 to 20 minute procedure >> so then we identify the regions of the brain it's not like think of this as a brain I cannot get everywhere
(1:29:00) >> so it has to be certain areas of the brain where I give frontal prefrontal contact, dorsal lateral contact, prefrontal cortex and atla. So we identify those regions and we put those uh electrodes and they pass those waves. You just have to you know sleep just close your eyes and relax music and then you just have to relax.
(1:29:23) Sometimes there might be certain sensitive people that wave causes tingling sensation passing because it is literally like a ring you know current passing through your brain and your nerves. So that tingling sensation people are sensitive then we have to identify why then we decrease the dosing or we don't give it a lot new new techniques are coming now we have deep TMS which is like a proper helmet you just put it on your helmet uh enter the settings >> this is just to balance the chemicals >> yes and it is basically identify for
(1:29:53) what reason you're giving so for deepms we give it for depression anxiety kota research is coming out for smoking session addiction patterns but we use it more for uh depression and anxiety and OCD. >> That's so cool. >> Yeah. So, it's like a helmet. You just wear a helmet, you sit for 20 minutes, you close your eyes, relax.
(1:30:14) And that's the latest technology right now. >> Okay. >> Deep TMS. It's expensive as well, but it's very easy. You just enter the settings, you know what to do, select your areas and press start, and the machine does the work for you and but the doctor or the technician or the staff nurse has to be there just to see nothing bad happens and which is very very rare.
(1:30:34) So a lot of changes in this department is happening. So it is called neurom modulation. >> Okay. >> We are trying to modulate the things chemically in the brain the neuro. >> So lot of things will come up in the future. Definitely in maybe next 5 years or 10 years you will see new new machines coming up new new techniques coming up.
(1:30:54) There's also a surgery where we do the neurosurgery team you know for severe cases where there's movement disorders or like neuro disorders. uh we implant a small chip DBS deep brain stimulation movies chip we implant it into the brain region >> brain okay >> so that is to conduct or modulate on the own so where the movements exactly if it's like involuntary like jerks you're unable to control so that chip in a way you know modulates it or the you know regulates in the certain region to stop the movement >> okay so it chala chala wonderful
(1:31:28) researches are going on >> so cool what you just mentioned about TMS. So, doctor, but can you really be honest? Do people actually get better or they just learn like pattern or do they actually get better? >> So, a lot of it depends on the person I feel. Like for example there was an accident you lost your legs you get your you know artificial implants you get your thing but you need to have that willpower to do the physiootherapy to do that work yes you can walk again you can run again >> recently movie the same thing you need to have that
(1:32:13) determination to do something that willpower is innate it is different for you different for me but somewhere you need to you know even if it is not there you need to bring it and we do it from a third party like the doctor, the counseling, the psychotherapy. So we call it CBT, cognitive behavioral therapy.
(1:32:35) So we try to you know teach the person his behavioral changes and you know patterns which will bring about a positive change. The goal is you know for example the goal is to bring certain change. You have to do certain things a to get that zed change. >> Okay. Okay. For example, anxiety, you have a stage fear. >> So, we will try to, you know, expose exposure therapy or something like that.
(1:32:58) Then we try to give you the confidence. Then we start giving you the mic. We start pushing you, you know, talk first best friend. Talk in front of your parents. Then start the small crowd. Talk in front of your school assembly. Then talk in front of the camera. These we are trying to break the patterns and give that confidence.
(1:33:15) But the person should also be participating in it. And yes when you do all these things definitely that Z goal which is speaking confidently in people in front of people like 100 giving a lecture in front of a class or even a crowd >> it becomes very easy and yes Danta assisted we do medications comes in anti-depressant anti-anxiety medications uh all these things to help the starting stages they might not be permanent but at least for the first four months you're going through therapy and you're trying to modify yourself low we give the medications to calm you.
(1:33:50) When you're calm, you do that activity. If you're not calm, you can't do that activity >> for sure. >> If you're like shaking like this, you can't even, you know, stand in front of a stage or hold a mic or even talk properly. You're going to stutter. You're going to stammer. So those things all are look at it's a holistic treatment.
(1:34:11) But people definitely do get better. I would say 80 90% for sure overall holistically if you approach the treatment be it psychiatry neur neurology also we work together with all the departments we work with medicine we work with neurology neurosurgery and we are the psychiatry or neuroscychiatric department then we work with the psychology department as well so overall if you say serious cases would take I won't lie uh we call it treatment refractory or some rare cases which even with medication patients or doing all the procedures nothing works. They are
(1:34:44) the you know sadly the most serious of the serious cases. >> So for example you must have heard antibiotics >> resisted treatment resistant. So TB treatment resistant anti-TB or this psych we have certain cases where it is so bad the person is delusional for so longer treatment for example the ghost goes away in the morning.
(1:35:22) Yeah, >> that is so you know rigid and every day has been put on to you and no one helped you for whatever reason sadly you didn't get the right treatment it becomes almost like permanent >> okay >> and for this person now if in 50s 60s uh comes up to us and says we'll definitely help we'll definitely do our ECTs our RTMS our our antisycchotics and all those treatments and therapy but it becomes very hard they might be improvement But they may not be also 100% deployment.
(1:35:56) So that is something that we'll have to live with. We Atlantic parents in family members coach how to deal with certain how to make it better situational how you can also as a family member because we won't be there 24/7. So we teach the parents, we teach the caregivers or the family members what to do in certain situations if the patient is uh very very out of control Ga.
(1:36:21) But because of lifelong and they have to live with it sadly but like any other disease medical or surgical even psychiat is the same we can treat it there are certain uh unavoidable circumstances where it becomes very hard for us to treat as well but like I said we don't give up there is always 100% commitment that we show and it is a chronic thing it can be a lifelong thing mental illness you need to understand is a journey >> it can be acute like say it can last for just few days, few weeks, it can be months, it can be years.
(1:36:57) >> Yeah. >> So that journey is what you need to be you know ready for and everything you know with the proper treatment goes very smoothly at least from what we see the new techniques that you mentioned the medications and therapy they're doing wonders. So everyone watching us right now um and feeling maybe I should also pay a visit to a psychiatrist.
(1:37:19) What would you tell them? >> I would tell please do not hesitate. Please do not take a break. If you are confused with who to reach out with, uh you can ask your friends and family. They are the best source because someone I guarantee you Magna someone must have visited a therapist or a psychiatrist or a doctor and nearby areas if you want Google the Google you can go to corporate hospitals nowadays majority not even majority I would say all the corporate hospitals have a psychiatry department so be the big ones like arit
(1:37:51) kims kamini yoda everyone has psychiatrist departments in it you can reach out there but to make it even more comfortable go to a doctor who your family or friends recommend. >> How do they find you? >> You can find me at Arit. You can find me at uh my clinic in Jibli Hills on Google.
(1:38:11) So, you can uh hit me up by my name on Google and I'm very easy to reach out. My my assistant in my clinic has my mobile number. Uh my corporate we have a call center. My assistants are there. So we are always available 24/7 beat 12:00 a.m. 2 a.m. >> It's amazing. >> Yeah. Thank you. We are readily available. Even a 2:00 a.m.
(1:38:33) call, we are ready to pick up because uh I bet I've been taught by my professor when I was a student. The first thing he told me was give your mobile number to your patient. We are like no why I want to sleep. I have a very hectic day. He was like no because we are psychiatry. What if a patient is standing at the you know edge of a building at say 2 or 3 in the morning and says I want to commit suicide because I lost my job or I was falsely framed in a criminal case by the police or whatever.
(1:39:05) That is when you pick up that call and give 30 seconds comfort like just comfort him >> reassurance >> reassurance comfort him be nice don't g no just whatever it is he will not have complete time to explain you his story but okay calm down just take a step back go to your bed drink water call your friend or give what we used to do is give your friends or spouses your family number and we used to call them from another number and be like chand babu or whatever is on the terrace please immediately go till that time we try to deescalate the situation and that
(1:39:40) was done in my early student days and that still sticks with me now and I've made it a routine by in my team or me or my juniors or whoever my colleagues we make it a rule that you have to take a call if it's a psychiatry because no one calls you say drun it is always going to be a serious call if they call you in the night >> yes >> and uh that is where uh uh we've been trying to do our thing and uh we do get a lot of calls and even the government has started national help lines like Tymanas if you know of Nimhans Bangalore
(1:40:15) there's Telman started by the Modi BJP government central government that is also 24/7 available but even if you don't get the correct response sadly sometimes it does happen >> the call is put on hold the call doesn't connect there's so many other things you can get like I said call the local doctors or like we are there available now.
(1:40:38) So do your information prior get the information through Google or family and friends and nearby hospitals help is always available and don't be shy to reach out. Number one rule is we keep things confidential. We do not if the clause is there if you say do not tell my parents and if you're like 18 major >> we do you know we are obliged to it we respect it but unless there is like threat to your life threat to safety and all then we are you know like you know we have to take that professional responsibility and inform someone because you are not doing well.
(1:41:11) >> Yes. >> So what we do promise is confidentiality. No one is going to know you came to us nor neither your best friends, your family if you want it that way. >> But I would encourage it to be open >> to share it with your you know family and friends because they are the best therapists first then we are the professionals for it.
(1:41:31) >> That is my message for everyone. >> Lastly, a very interesting question. If you had to put one sentence on uh billboards across Hyderabad about mental health, what would it be? Oh, tough one. [laughter] There's so many that come to mind. But one thing I would I would say is uh you're not alone. Maybe that is the pitch.
(1:41:59) Mental health, you have it. You are not alone. Everyone has their own story. Your own family or your own housemate, there will be one or two people suffering from mental health issues. your neighborhood, your office, co-workers, everyone has something or the other going on in their life. Be it medical problems, be it surgical, uh psychological, psychiatric.
(1:42:22) So don't think it's just you that you're alone. India is a big country. A lot of problems are there. Don't worry. >> That's amazing. Thank you so much for such an insightful conversation, Dr. >> Thank you so much, Ma. Thank you for having me over. >> Thank you. Thank you. >> Thank you. >> [music]
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